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  •  /  Friends  /  S08E06 The One With The Halloween Party


    • new scene
    • Scene 1

      Central Perk, everyone is there as Chandler and Monica enter. Oh, and Joey is wearing a FDNY T-shirt to make this the first nod to the tragedy that Friends have made.

    • monica
    • Monica
      Hey you guys?
    • ross
    • Ross
      What?
    • monica
    • Monica
      I know it's last minute, but we decided to have a Halloween party.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh good! (And there's general excitement.)
    • monica
    • Monica
      And everybody has to wear costumes. (And there's general disconcertment.) Come on! It'll be fun!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Well, I'll-I'll be there. I mean I have to wear a costume to all my classes that day anyway so...
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Please tell me you're not gonna dress up like a dinosaur.
    • ross
    • Ross
      (exhales sarcastically) Not two years in a row.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Look, I'll come to the party but I'm not dressing up.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You have to!
    • joey
    • Joey
      No way! Look, Halloween is so stupid! Dressing up, pretending to be someone you're not...
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You're an actor!
    • monica
    • Monica
      So Ross, are you gonna bring Mona?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah. Yeah, I think I will.
    • joey
    • Joey
      That hot girl from their wedding?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Well hey-hey if she needs any idea for costumes, she could be a bikini model, or a slutty nurse, or a sexy cheerleader huh-Ooh-ooh, Leatherface from The Texas Chainsaw Massacre-No-no-no! Slutty Leatherface.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Now wasn't Joey hitting on her at the wedding too?
    • ross
    • Ross
      That's right! He was hitting on her, and I got her. I guess the better man won. (To Joey) Please don't take her from me.
    • OPENING CREDITS
    • new scene
    • Scene 2

      A Street, Phoebe is walking down it and passes Ursula.

    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Ursula! (Ursula turns, smiles, and continues walking.) Wait! Err-err, it's me! Phoebe!
    • Ursula
      Oh, I thought there was a mirror there. Okay, bye-bye. (Starts to walk again.)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Wait a second! So, what's new with you?
    • Ursula
      Umm, nothing. I mean, I'm getting married next week.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      What?!
    • Ursula
      Yeah! Yeah, it's gonna be a small ceremony. Just family. (Phoebe looks at her.) His.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Huh. Okay. Well, I'm really happy for you. (Starts to walk away.)
    • Ursula
      Wait! If umm, if you want to come, I guess that'd be okay.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Really?
    • Ursula
      Sure! Why not? You could be my sister for the day.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yeah. Okay. Umm, y'know, my friends are having a Halloween party tonight at my old apartment so, you could come. Maybe I could meet the guy you're marrying.
    • Ursula
      Huh. Well, I'm supposed to be working at the restaurant tonight. I'm supposed to be working right now, so who cares.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      By the way, it's a costume party.
    • Ursula
      Oh! Okay, so that's why you're... (Motions to what she's wearing.)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (looks down) No. But thanks. (Walks away.)
    • new scene
    • Scene 3

      Monica and Chandler's, The Halloween party has started. Monica is setting out some food as Rachel enters.

    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hi!
    • monica
    • Monica
      Wait! You're supposed to wear a costume!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      I am! I am a woman who spent a lot of money on a dress and she wants to wear it, because soon she won't be able to fit into it.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ahh!
    • monica
    • Monica
      I'm Catwoman, who wants to borrow the dress when you're too big for it.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Okay.
    • (There's a knock on the door.)
    • Kids
      Trick or treat!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh! Oh! Can I give out the candy? I really want to be with the kids right now. Y'know, ever since I got pregnant I-I have the strongest maternal instincts.
    • Kids
      Trick or treat!!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (to them) Just a minute!!! (She takes the candy and opens the door to two parents, a witch, a clown, and a cowgirl.) Look at you guys! Wow! You are a very scary witch. (Gives her candy.)
    • Witch
      Thank you.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      And you are a very funny clown. (Gives him candy.)
    • Clown
      Thank you.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (to the cowgirl) And you are so in style right now. Y'know, I work at Ralph Lauren and the whole fall line has got this like equestrian theme going on. I don't suppose you saw the cover of British Vogue, but...
    • Cowgirl
      (interrupting) Can I just have the candy?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Yeah. Sure. (Throws some in her bag and she walks away as Phoebe, dressed as Supergirl walks up and eyes Monica who eyes her back.)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Ah, Catwoman. So we meet again.
    • monica
    • Monica
      So we do Supergirl.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No, it's me. Phoebe!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (entering from the bedroom wearing a big, pink bunny costume) Monica! Can I talk to you for a second? Listen, I appreciate you getting me the costume...
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (To Monica) Oh, you did this to him?
    • monica
    • Monica
      What?! I thought he'd love it! His favorite kid's book was the Velveteen Rabbit!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      The Velveteen Rabbit was brown and white!
    • monica
    • Monica
      Well, it was either a pink bunny or no bunny at all.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No bunny at all!! Always no bunny at all!!!
    • joey
    • Joey
      (entering) Hey!
    • monica
    • Monica
      You didn't dress up either?!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yes I did! I'm Chandler. (Looks at Chandler) Dude, what happened?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      How is that me?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Okay. I'm Chandler (makes a growling/gurgling sound at the end and the girls laugh.)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (To Chandler) That is so you!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      When have I ever done that?!
    • joey
    • Joey
      When have I ever done that?! (And does the sound again.)
    • (There's a knock on the door.)
    • Girl
      Trick or treat!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh! (Opens the door to reveal a ballerina) Well you're just the prettiest ballerina I've ever seen.
    • Ballerina
      Thank you. (Pirouettes.)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh wow! That deserves another piece of candy.
    • Ballerina
      Thank you. (Does another ballerina move.)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Well, I have to say that earns tutu pieces of candy.
    • Ballerina
      I love you! (Hugs Rachel.)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ohh... Oh, honey here. Take it all. (Pours the entire large bowl into her bag and closes the door.) Monica! We need more candy?
    • monica
    • Monica
      What?! There's only been like four kids.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Yeah I know, but one of them just said that she loved me so I just gave her everything.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No wonder your pregnant.
    • ross
    • Ross
      (entering) Hey! (He's wearing a costume as well.)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hey.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What are you supposed to be?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Remember the Russian satellite, Sputnik? (They all look at him.) Well, I'm a potato or a...spud. And these are my antennae. (Points to the colander with an old TV antenna glued on top that he's wearing.) So Sputnik, becomes... (They're still confused) Spud-nik. Spudnik!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Wow! I don't have the worst costume anymore!
    • joey
    • Joey
      (sees Ross) Hey all right, Ross came as doody.
    • ross
    • Ross
      No, I-I'm not doody.
    • monica
    • Monica
      No, space doody!
    • (Joey gives him the okay symbol, and Ross rushes towards him to be stopped by Chandler. Meanwhile, Phoebe goes over to the snack table as some guy, which turns out to be Ursula's fianc'e Eric, walks in and smacks her butt.)
    • Eric
      Aren't you gonna give me a kiss?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Okay, I will. But right after you tell me who the hell you are.
    • Eric
      Ursula?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Ursula's fianc'e?
    • Eric
      Oh my God, you're the sister!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yeah.
    • Eric
      Okay, I just slapped my future sister-in-law's ass.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yeah.
    • Eric
      I'm an idiot. Uh, is your mother here? Maybe I can give her a little slap on the butt.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      My mother killed herself.
    • Eric
      She, now I knew that and...now I'm sweating. Look at me, I'm really sweating-Now I'm saying, "Look at me," I'm getting even sweatier. I think I probably should go.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No-no! That's okay, we'll just start over. Okay? Hi! I'm Phoebe.
    • Eric
      Eric. (They shake hands and he's squinting. And, no, it's not me.)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Why are you looking at me like that?
    • Eric
      'Cause the sweat's getting in my eyes and its burning.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Okay. (Hands him a napkin.) So, what are you?
    • Eric
      I don't think they have a name for it. It's just I get nervous; I start sweating like crazy.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (laughs) No I-I meant your costume.
    • Eric
      Oh umm, I'm the solar system. (He's wearing a black sweater with the planets glued on around the sun.) Yeah, my students helped me make it-I teach the second grade.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      I love the second grade!
    • Eric
      Really?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yeah! It's so much better than first grade when you don't know what's going on and definitely better than third grade. Y'know with all the politics and mind games.
    • Eric
      So what do you do?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Umm, I'm a masseuse...by day. (Stands with her hands on her hips like a Supergirl pose.)
    • Eric
      Y'know you don't have to stand here with me, believe me...
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No I'm having fun. I'm really-And I'm really-really excited for you and Ursula.
    • Eric
      Oh I feel very lucky, she's great. I think she's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Thank you.
    • [Time lapse, Monica is going over to talk to Joey.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      Hey Joey?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yeah.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You read comic books right?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Exclusively.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Who do you think would win in a fight, Catwoman or Supergirl?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Catwoman, hands down.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Yeah...
    • joey
    • Joey
      But between you and Phoebe, I'd have to give the edge to Phoebe.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What?! Really?!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Are you kiddin'? Phoebe lived on the street. Okay? Plus, she's got this crazy temper. She-She's not standing right behind me is she?
    • monica
    • Monica
      No you're fine. (Joey checks anyway.) All right well, do you think I could take Rachel?
    • joey
    • Joey
      I'm not sure.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What?! Come on I am tough! Punch me right here! (Her stomach) As hard as you can!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Will you relax?! What are you taking this so seriously for? It doesn't matter.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh really? Okay? Well what would you say if I told you that, y'know, Ross or Chandler could beat you up?
    • joey
    • Joey
      I would say, "Woman, please!"
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (walking over) Hey. Ursula's fianc'e is really sweet! He's a teacher, he does all this volunteer work. Y'know normally y'know, I don't like really sweaty guys. But this one? I could just mop him up!
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh my God, Phoebe!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      What?
    • monica
    • Monica
      You're getting a crush on your sister's fianc'e.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No I'm not! You are!
    • joey
    • Joey
      (To Monica) Here comes the temper.
    • (There's a knock on the door and Rachel opens it to a little girl.)
    • Girl
      Trick or treat!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hi! Y'know what honey, we're actually out of candy right now. But someone just went out to get some and I have been giving out money but I'm out of that too. Hey, can I write you a check?
    • Girl
      Okay!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Okay, what's your name?
    • Girl
      Lelani Mayolanofavich.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Okay, I'm just gonna write this out to cash.
    • Mona
      (entering) Hi!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hey Mona!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh! Hi!
    • Mona
      Hi!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Joey's gonna be thrilled! He was hoping you'd come by as a slutty nurse.
    • Mona
      Umm, actually I'm just a nurse.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You'd think that would embarrass me, but you see I'm maxed out.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hey!
    • Mona
      Hi!
    • ross
    • Ross
      You made it!
    • Mona
      Wait-wait! You're umm, you're a potato...
    • ross
    • Ross
      Well, I'm a spud...
    • Mona
      And the antennae...Oh my God you're Spudnik!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yes!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (To Ross) Marry her.
    • [Cut to Joey and Monica.]
    • joey
    • Joey
      Okay, here's a good one for ya. Who do think would win in a fight between Ross and Chandler.
    • monica
    • Monica
      I can't answer that! Chandler's my husband.
    • joey
    • Joey
      So Ross?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Yeah.
    • [Cut to Phoebe and Eric.]
    • Eric
      Hey beautiful.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hello handsome. (Sees Ursula over her shoulder) Oh God. (Walks away in shame as they kiss.) Oh look at you two. So when did you guys meet?
    • Eric
      Two weeks ago.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Two weeks? That's it?
    • Eric
      Yeah, I know it sounds crazy, and it's not like me to do something so impulsive, but she's just so perfect, and we have so much in common.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh really?
    • Eric
      We're both teachers.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Huh? (Ursula motions for Phoebe to keep quiet.)
    • Eric
      And we were both in the Peace Corps.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Peace Corps, really? (Ursula motions, "I don't know.")
    • Eric
      In fact when we were building houses in Uruguay, we were, we were just two towns apart and we never met.
    • Ursula
      Yeah. It wasn't a town when I got there, but it was a town when I left. (To Eric) Shall we get me really drunk?
    • Eric
      Sure.
    • (They walk away.)
    • [Cut to Mona and Ross walking past Chandler.]
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Howdy doody.
    • ross
    • Ross
      That's funny. Yeah. Y'know you're the funniest man here in a pink bunny costume his wife made him wear.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh relax man, relax. You're looking a little flushed.
    • joey
    • Joey
      (To Monica) Hey-hey-hey, I think we might find out the answer to our question.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      What question?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Monica and I were talking about who could kick whose ass in a fight, you or Ross?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      There's no question.
    • joey
    • Joey
      So you think Ross too?
    • (Monica turns around slowly.)
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (To Monica) You picked Ross?!
    • monica
    • Monica
      Ross is really strong! Okay, he's the strongest out of all three of you! (Joey looks at her.) Except for Joey.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I cannot believe you didn't pick me.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Uh, in her defense, she's right. I am stronger. I would destroy you.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh really?! You think you're stronger? Why don't you prove it? (He pushes Ross who starts to fall backwards until Mona catches him.)
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh I'll prove it! I'll prove it like a theorem!!
    • (They start to fight with Ross pulling on Chandler's ears and Chandler hitting Ross over the head with his carrot.)
    • monica
    • Monica
      Wait-wait!! Okay, stop it! Stop it! Stop! (Breaks it up.) Now listen, no one's gonna fight in this apartment.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey Monica! (Grabs her and pulls her into the living room.) People came to see a fight, let's give 'em what they came for!
    • Mona
      Hey, you guys could arm wrestle.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yeah. Listen to the slutty nurse.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (To Ross) You're going down.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh yeah? You're going further down! Downtown!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Seriously guys, the trash talk is embarrassing.
    • COMMERCIAL BREAK
    • new scene
    • Scene 4

      Monica and Chandler's, the party continues with Rachel leaning on the counter as Gunther walks in carrying candy.

    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh Gunther! You brought candy! Thank you so much for picking this up! You are so sweet.
    • Gunther
      Really?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Honey, someday you are gonna make some man the luckiest guy in the world.
    • (There's a knock on the door.)
    • Kid
      Trick or treat!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Gotta go! (Opens the door to a boy in a cape.) Hi! Wow! There you go! (Hands him some candy.)
    • Boy in the Cape
      My friend Lewis told me you were giving out money.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh yeah, we were but umm, now we've got candy.
    • Boy in the Cape
      I'd rather have the money.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Well, that-that's not your choice. Happy Halloween!
    • Boy in the Cape
      This isn't fair.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Well is it fair that all you did was put on a cape and I gotta give you free stuff?
    • Boy in the Cape
      Shut up!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      You shut up!
    • (The gang gets interested now.)
    • Boy in the Cape
      You can't tell me to shut up!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Uh, I think I just did. And uh-oh, here it comes again. Shut up!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Rach?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (To Joey) Yeah I know-I'm good-I got it! (Joey slowly backs away.) (To the boy) Now wait a minute, I've got one more thing I have to say to you...oh right! Shut up!
    • Boy in the Cape
      You're a mean old woman. (Runs away.)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      No! Wait no! Shut up-I mean don't cry! Let me get my checkbook! (Grabs her checkbook and runs after him.)
    • [Cut to Mona and Joey clearing the dining room table for the grudge match between Chandler and Ross.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      (To Chandler) Look honey, you don't have to do this, okay? It's the strength you have inside that means the most to me. You're loyal, you're honest, and you have integrity! That's the kind of strength that I want in the man that I love!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      That means nothing to me. (To Ross) Come on!
    • new scene
    • Scene 5

      The Hallway, Phoebe is exiting Monica and Chandler's, and finds Ursula standing in the hallway smoking.

    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hi liar!
    • Ursula
      Hey!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Y'know the only reason he's marrying you is because he thinks all the things you were saying about yourself were true.
    • Ursula
      Well they could be true.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      But they're not!
    • Ursula
      Yeah, it's a fine line huh?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Why are you lying to him?
    • Ursula
      I don't know. He said he did all this stuff and then I said I did it too and he got so excited, it was really fun.
    • Eric
      (entering) Honey?
    • Ursula
      (waving the cigarette in Phoebe's face) It's a filthy, disgusting habit and I want you to quit now!
    • Eric
      She's helped so many people to quit smoking.
    • Ursula
      Y'know, we'd really better get going.
    • Eric
      Oh right, you've got a church group meeting tonight.
    • Ursula
      Right. (Walks down the stairs.)
    • Eric
      (To Phoebe) Well, it was nice meeting you.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      You too. And Ursula?! It was really nice meeting you tonight!!
    • joey
    • Joey
      (entering) Pheebs come on! Bunny vs. Doody! We're waiting! (They go inside.) (To Chandler and Ross.) Okay. Okay guys, one match, winner take all. (They grasp each other's hand in preparation for battle.) Oh wait-wait! What does the winner get?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Pride.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      And dignity.
    • joey
    • Joey
      (laughing) Okay, if you say so. All right, ready? Set! Go!
    • (They start wrestling, only they are unable to move either one's arm despite a huge strain on their faces and a cheering crowd.)
    • [Time Lapse
      the crowd has left and only Mona, Monica, Joey, and Phoebe are still watching to see who will be able to move the other's arm first. An event that has yet to happen.]
    • Mona
      (To Joey) Wow! They're both really strong.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Or equally weak.
    • monica
    • Monica
      (To Phoebe) Oh God!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hmm?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Chandler's making his sex face.
    • (Basically Chandler's face looks like he's not all there and is staring off into the distance...)
    • ross
    • Ross
      (To Chandler) So, you gettin' tired?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Nope! I can do this all day.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah? Me too. (Pause) Gettin' a little tired though.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      God, I'm exhausted.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Look this is starting to look really bad for me. Okay? Mona, Mona's standing right over there. (Looks behind him.) Oh God, she's talking to Joey! You gotta let me win!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No way! If anything you've gotta let me win! My wife thinks I'm a wimp!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hey, at least you have a wife! I-I keep getting divorces and knockin' people up! And I'm dressed as doody.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You're Spudnik.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Come on, who are we kidding? I'm doody. Please? She's watchin'.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Fine. (He lets Ross win.) Oh no!
    • ross
    • Ross
      (celebrating) Oh yeah!
    • Mona
      (clapping) Yay! My hero!
    • joey
    • Joey
      (to her) You're a weird lady.
    • Eric
      (entering) Hey. Ursula said she left her purse.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh.
    • Eric
      (finds it) What a relief. It has all the numbers of the people in her prayer chain.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Sure it does. Yeah, yeah.
    • Eric
      Well, I guess I'll see you at the wedding. (Exits and Phoebe follows him into the hall.)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Umm listen, I don't think...I don't think I'm gonna make it to the wedding. So I just want to wish you all the luck in the world.
    • Eric
      I think we'll be okay. Besides it's so perfect and (whispering) she's been saving herself for me.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Okay I can't let you do this! She's lying to you.
    • Eric
      What?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      She is lying! And I bet I can prove it. Excuse me. (She grabs Ursula's purse and starts going through it and finds some papers.) Okay. Okay. Yeah-Not a prayer chain, but what looks like a detailed drawing of a bank floor plan. (Holds up her nametag.) Okay, here's the nametag from the restaurant where she works as a waitress! Not a teacher, a waitress. All right, here's her driver license, this oughta be good, she always lies about this. How old did she say she was?
    • Eric
      She told me she was 25.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, I almost don't want to show this. (Hands it to him.) Just remember I'm a minute younger.
    • Eric
      I am so stupid. Of course she was lying! She's not a teacher. There's not such a thing as the top secret elementary school for the children of spies.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No. You're not, you're not stupid.
    • Eric
      I'm not smart. (Phoebe has no comeback.) I just wanted so much to...be impulsive once. To be romantic.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      That's good, you should be impulsive and you should be romantic. Just...you did it with the wrong person. (He looks at her.) What?
    • Eric
      It's just so weird, two people look so much alike, and so different.
    • Ursula
      (yelling from downstairs) Eric!! Let's go!!
    • Eric
      I'd better go, deal...
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yeah, you should. (They shake hands.)
    • Ursula
      Hurry up I gotta pray!!
    • (Phoebe hands Eric Ursula's purse and he walks away.)
    • [Time Lapse
      Rachel is returning from chasing down the boy in the cape.]
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hey! Well, I had to give the kid fifty bucks to stop crying.
    • joey
    • Joey
      That's not so bad.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      No, I also had to go to a couple houses with him as his girlfriend. Oh, I am just awful with children!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Come on! You're good with kids. They're just crazy on Halloween. Y'know, they're all greedy and hopped up on sugar!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Really? You think that's all it is?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Absolutely! Halloween is the worst. Except for Christmas...and their birthdays. Kinda get a little crazy during the summer too. And anytime they're hungry or sleepy. Y'know, kids are tough. Good luck with that. (Walks away.)
    • CLOSING CREDITS
    • new scene
    • Scene 6

      Monica and Chandler's, Chandler and Monica are standing in the kitchen.

    • monica
    • Monica
      Look, I wanted to tell I'm-I'm sorry you lost.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Listen, I've got a secret for ya. I let him win.
    • monica
    • Monica
      (laughs) Is that a secret or a lie.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No, I let him win-Ross!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Would you tell her I let you win please?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh. Yeah. (Sarcastically) Uh Chandler let me win. No, Chandler's really strong. Oh my arm is so sore. Oh nurse! (Waddles over to Mona.)
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I am strong! I'll show you! (He sits down at the table.)
    • monica
    • Monica
      Chandler please!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh what's the matter? Are you scared?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Let's go big bunny!
    • (They assume the starting position.)
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Okay. 1...2...3-Go! (Once again he's at a stalemate, but this time he's in pain.) (Pause) I'm gonna kill myself!
    • END