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  •  /  Friends  /  S02E10 The One With Russ


    • new scene
    • Scene 1

      The gang is walking to a newsstand late at night. Joey is anxiously in the lead.

    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Joey, would you slow down? They're not gonna be sold out of papers at one o'clock in the morning.
    • joey
    • Joey
      I'm excited! I've never gotten reviewed before.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You were so amazing as the king. I was really impressed, I was.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Although, you know what? You might want to consider wearing underwear next time. Yeah, cause when you sat down on your throne you could kind of see your... royal subject.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Here it is, here it is. [reading from newspaper] The only thing worse than the mindless, adolescent direction was Joseph Tribbiani's disturbingly unskilled portrayal of the king.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      OK, look, that is one guy's opinion, alright. Phoebs, read yours.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      OK. [reading] The only thing worse than the mindless, adolescent direction...
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Does anyone have one from a different paper? Ross, read yours.
    • ross
    • Ross
      I don't want to.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Joey, honey, they don't know what they're talking about.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Maybe they do. I've been doin' this ten years and I haven't gotten anywhere. There's gotta be a reason.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh c'mon. Maybe you're just, uhhh... paying your dues.
    • joey
    • Joey
      No, no, no, it.. it's too hard. It's not worth it. I quit.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait one minute. Wait a minute. I believe this will change your mind. [Reads from paper] In a mediocre play, Joseph Tribbiani was able to achieve brilliant new levels of... continued on page 153...[turns it] sucking.
    • OPENING CREDITS
    • new scene
    • Scene 2

      Chandler, Phoebe, Rachel, Monica comforting Joey at Monica and Rachel's apartment.

    • joey
    • Joey
      When I was little, I wanted to be a veteranarian, but then I found out you had to put your hands into cows and stuff.
    • [Ross enters, depressed.]
    • ross
    • Ross
      [sullenly] Hiiiiii.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Are... are you OK?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah, yeah, just a tough day at work. A stegosaurus fell over and trapped a kid. Whoa, whoa, I know this jacket, this is, th--Fun Bobby's jacket! Where is he, what. He, he's here, isn't he?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Maybe.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Don't toy with me.
    • [Fun Bobby enters from Monica's bedroom.]
    • Fun Bobby
      Geller!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hey, Fun Bobby!
    • Fun Bobby
      Hey. Whoa, hey, you've been working out, huh?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Not at all! I love this guy. Hey, I was so psyched to hear you're back with my sister!
    • monica
    • Monica
      You and me both.
    • Fun Bobby
      Hey, so what'd I miss, what'd I miss, c'mon?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, we were just trying to make Joey feel better.
    • Fun Bobby
      Hey, do you need me to pick you up?
    • joey
    • Joey
      No, I'm alright man. Really.
    • Fun Bobby
      No, I'm picking you up.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey no, seriously, I don't need you to pick me... [Fun Bobby picks Joey up off the ground, bounces him. Joey laughs.] Alright! It still works.
    • Fun Bobby
      OK, now before I go, does anybody else need to be picked up? [everyone raises their hands] I'm still gonna go.
    • monica
    • Monica
      OK, I'll see you later babe.
    • Fun Bobby
      Uh, public display of affection coming up. You can avert your eyes. [kisses Monica]
    • [Chandler and Joey are watching, Rachel turns their heads away from Monica.]
    • Fun Bobby
      See ya. [exits]
    • Everyone
      Bye! See you later!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Fun Bobby is so great.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh, isn't he? Oh, you know, I really think this time it may work with him. I mean, he just makes me feel so good and I've been feeling so lousy this last couple of months, no job, no boyfriend. Well, at least my cup is half full.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Half full of looooovvvvve.
    • monica
    • Monica
      And for our two-week anniversary, he's gonna take me to his cousin's cabin for the weekend.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Cabin of loooooovvvvve.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      We went through a lot of wine tonight, you guys. [walks over to table, holding five empty wine bottles]
    • monica
    • Monica
      Really? I only had two glasses.
    • joey
    • Joey
      I just had a glass.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Two.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      I had one glass.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I had about a mugful in this lovely 'I got boned at the Museum of Natural History' mug.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      OK, so that's... that's what, two bottles? And yet somehow we went through five?
    • [All look towards door Fun Bobby left through.]
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oooooh.
    • joey
    • Joey
      [realizing what everyone else did a minute ago] Ooooooh.
    • monica
    • Monica
      So what. So he drank a lot tonight.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yeah but, you know, now that I think about it, I don't think I've ever seen Fun Bobby without a... a drink in his hand.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yeah. Oh, OOOH, yeah, you know, did you notice how he always starts his stories with, um, OK, 'I was soooo wasted,' or, 'Oh, we were soooo bombed,' or, ummm, ooh, ooh, 'So I wake up, and I'm in this dumpster in Connecticut.'
    • joey
    • Joey
      Monica, have you ever been with him when he wasn't drinking?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Well, we just happen to go to alot of places where you might drink. I mean, how do you go to a wine tasting without having a drink? Or... or to a club, or to the... zoo.
    • new scene
    • Scene 3

      Monica, Fun Bobby, and Phoebe sitting in Central Perk Rachel is serving them. She brings a mug to Monica.

    • monica
    • Monica
      Rach, does this have nonfat milk?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ehhhummmm, I don't know, why don't you taste it.
    • monica
    • Monica
      [takes a sip] Mmmm, no.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh well, too late, sorry, you already had some.
    • Fun Bobby
      [pulls out a flask] Whattaya say we make these, uh, coffees Irish?
    • [Phoebe and Rachel look uncomfortable.]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Um, cake.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Yeah, we're gonna... we're gonna get some cake. [Phoebe and Rachel go to counter.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      You know what? It seems like you've been making an awful lot of stuff Irish lately.
    • Fun Bobby
      Well, I would make them Belgian, but the waffles are hard to get into that flask.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Bobby.
    • Fun Bobby
      Yeah, OK.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Look, maybe this is none of my business, or maybe it is, I don't know... but, uh, I'm kind of worried about you.
    • Fun Bobby
      OK, look, this isn't the first time somebody's said something to me about this, but, I don't know... I always made excuses about it, like... uhhh... 'I'm just a social drinker,' or, 'C'mon, it's Flag Day.'
    • monica
    • Monica
      So, what are you saying now?
    • Fun Bobby
      I guess I'm saying, I'll try and quit. I kinda like that you worry about me. [they hug]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      [comes back to couch, with cake] Sooo, what's goin' on, huh?
    • Fun Bobby
      I am gonna try and quit drinking.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      [sad] Ooohh, why?
    • [Chandler and Joey enter.]
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Hey.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Hey.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hey.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Guess who's back in show business.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Ohh, ohh, Lorne Green?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No, no, Phoebs. You know why? Cause he's dead.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, no.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      OK, I guess this is gonna seem kinda bittersweet now, but... Joey, that's who.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yeah, my agent just called me with an audition for Days of Our Lives!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, well, we have to celebrate. You know what we should do? We should do, like, a soap opera theme.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Hey, yeah... we could all sleep together and then one of us could get amnesia.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hey Rach, what time do you get off? We're all gonna do something tonight.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ummmm.... well, actually I'm already done, but I...I kinda got plans.
    • monica
    • Monica
      [gasps] You have other friends?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Yeah... I, uhh... I have a... I have a date.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What?
    • joey
    • Joey
      With a man?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What? What is so strange about me having a date?
    • joey
    • Joey
      What about Ross? I mean, are you still mad at him cause he made that list about you?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Noooo, no, I'm not mad at him. I'm.. I'm not really anything at him anymore.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What are you talking about?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      I don't know. Whatever I was feeling, I'm... not.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      But you guys came so close.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh, I know, I'm sorry you guys. You're just gonna have to get used to the fact that I will not be dating Ross.
    • [Russ enters Central Perk. He looks like Ross, except for his chin and hair (it is David Schwimmer in a dual role).]
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Here he is. Hi. Guys, this is Russ.
    • Russ
      [sounding like Ross] Hhhhiiiii.
    • [Everyone looks at each other in amazement.]
    • new scene
    • Scene 4

      Estelle Leonard Talent Agency. Estelle is speaking on the phone.

    • Estelle
      Stop saying you're not talented, you're very talented. It's just with the bird dead and all, there's very little act left. Oh, honey, give me a break, will ya? [a knock on the door] Oooh, ooh, I'll talk to you later.
    • [Joey enters.]
    • Estelle
      Well, there's my favorite client. So tell me darling, how was the audition?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Well, I think it went pretty well. I.. I got a callback for Thursday.
    • Estelle
      Joey, have you ever seen me ecstatic?
    • joey
    • Joey
      No.
    • Estelle
      Well, here it is. [She almost smiles.]
    • joey
    • Joey
      OK, uh.... listen, there's something I want to talk to you about. The network casting lady...
    • Estelle
      Oh, isn't Lori a doll?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Oh yeah, yeah, she's great, but... I kinda got the feeling that she was sort of... coming on to me. And I definitely would get the part if I would've... you know... if I would have sent the Little General in.
    • Estelle
      Oh, I see. Well, I'm just gonna put in a call here and we'll find out what's goin' on and straighten it out. [picks up the phone] Yeah, hi, Lori please. [pause] Hi darling. So how 'bout Joey Tribbiani for the part of the cab driver, isn't he terrific? [pause] Uh-huuuuh. [pause] Uh-huuuuh. OK, doll. Talk to you later. [hangs up] [to Joey] Yeah, you're gonna have to sleep with her.
    • new scene
    • Scene 5

      Central Perk. Monica and Rachel at counter, Phoebe, Chandler, and Fun Bobby at the couch.

    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What's the matter?
    • monica
    • Monica
      It's Fun Bobby.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What, isn't he sober?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh, he's sober alright. Just turns out that Fun Bobby was fun for a reason.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ohhh, OK.
    • [Monica returns to couch next to Fun Bobby.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      Alright, here you go, sweetie. [hands Fun Bobby his coffee]
    • Fun Bobby
      Thanks. You wanna hear something funny?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh God, yes!
    • Fun Bobby
      There are no hardware stores open past midnight in the Village.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      That is funny.
    • Fun Bobby
      I needed to buy a hammer the other night, and I'm out walkin' around the neighborhood but apparently there are no hardware stores open past midnight in the Village.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Ahhh, hey honey? Don't you have to be at your interview now?
    • Fun Bobby
      Oh yeah. See you guys. [leaves]
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Bye..... ridiculously dull Bobby.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh.... my... God.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      It's not that bad.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Not that bad? Did you hear the hammer story?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      OK, OK, don't get all squinky.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Maybe it was just the kind of story where you have to be there.
    • monica
    • Monica
      But I'm gonna be there... for the rest of my life. I mean, I can't break up with him. I'm the one who made him quit drinking. He's dull because of me.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Alright, don't say that. He's probably always been dull. You just, you know, set it free.
    • [Russ enters, walking in behind Chandler.]
    • Russ
      Hi.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      [turning around] Hey Ross.... bahhhh!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hi Russ, I've just got two more tables to clean and then we'll go, OK?
    • Russ
      OK, I'll just sit here and... uh... chat with your, uh.... friend-type....people.
    • [Phoebe walks up to Rachel, cleaning tables.]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Rachel? Um, hi.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Hi.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      OK, so, you know what you're doing, right?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Uhh.... waitressing?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Well, yeah, but... no. I mean, umm... doesn't.... doesn't Russ just remind you of someone?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      [looks at him] Huh, Bob Saget?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      [looks at Russ] Oh, yeah! No, no, no, no, oh, oh.
    • [Phoebe turns back around but Rachel is gone. Ross enters.]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, my, oh!
    • ross
    • Ross
      What? What's wrong?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      I, OK....
    • monica
    • Monica
      She's just upset because she, uh, she buttered a spider into her toast this morning.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Alright.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      [to Phoebe] Listen, Phoebs, this is gonna be OK. [introducing Russ and Ross] Ross, Russ. Russ, Ross.
    • Russ
      Hi.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hi.
    • Russ
      Are you a, uh, friend of Rachel's?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yes, yes I am. Are you a, uh, a friend of Rachel's?
    • Russ
      Actually, I'm a... kind of a.... you know, a... date-type... thing... of Rachel's.
    • ross
    • Ross
      A date.
    • Russ
      Yeah, I'm her date.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh, oh, you're... uh... you're, oh you're the date.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You know, this is actually good, because if we ever lose Ross, we have a spare.
    • Russ
      Oh, you are the, uh... paleontologist.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Yes, yes I am. And you are a....
    • Russ
      Periodontist.
    • monica
    • Monica
      See? They're as different as night and... later that night.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Well, I am going to, uh... get a beverage. It was nice, nice... uh... meeting you.
    • Russ
      Ditto.
    • [R0ss approaches Rachel at counter.]
    • ross
    • Ross
      I, uh, well... I... I met Russ.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hey, I didn't know we were, uh, seeing other people.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Well, we're not seeing each other, so....
    • ross
    • Ross
      Well, uh, for your information, there's a woman at the museum, who's curator of moths and other... uh... winged things... who's, uh, let it be known that she is drawn to me much like a... well, you know. But so far I've been keeping her at bay, but, uh, if this is the deal...
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Well, yeah, this is the deal.
    • ross
    • Ross
      OK, well, um, have a nice evening.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Um, Russ, you ready?
    • Russ
      Yeah.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Bye.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Bye.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Bye.
    • [Russ and Rachel leave together.]
    • ross
    • Ross
      [upset] She's dating. She's dating.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Yes, yes, but did you see who she was dating?
    • ross
    • Ross
      What do you mean?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Do you not see it?
    • ross
    • Ross
      See what? I don't know what she sees in... innn that goober. And it takes him, what? Like... like... I don't know, uhh... uhhh, hello.... a... week, to get out a sentence.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Yeah, it's annoying, isn't it?
    • ross
    • Ross
      ....................Yeah.
    • new scene
    • Scene 6

      Chandler and Joey's apartment. Joey is making marinara sauce and filling every container in sight. Chandler enters.

    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Hey.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Whoa, whoa, so I'm guessing you didn't get the part, or... uh, Italy called and said it was hungry.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Well, the part's mine if I want it.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh my God!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yeah, if I'm willing to sleep with the casting lady.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      [not knowing how to react] Oh my... God?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Ten years I've been waiting for a break like this Chandler, ten years! I mean, Days of Our Lives. That's actually on television.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      So, what're you gonna do?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Well, I guess I could sleep with her... I mean, how could I do that?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Well, I... I've got a pop-up book that told me everything I need to know.
    • joey
    • Joey
      I've never slept with someone for a part.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Well is she... [reaches into the cookie jar for a cookie, takes his hand out, covered with pasta sauce]
    • joey
    • Joey
      Sorry.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      It's alright. Is she good-looking?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yeah, she's totally good looking. I mean, if I met her in a bar, or something, I'd be buying her breakfast. [pause] You know, after having slept with her.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Y'know, maybe this isn't such a big deal. Y'know, I mean, the way that I see it is you get a great job and you get to have sex. Y'know, I mean, throw in a tree and a fat guy and you've got Christmas.
    • joey
    • Joey
      I just... I just don't think that I want it that way though, y'know? I mean, let's say I do make it, alright? I'm always gonna look back and wonder if it was because of my talent or because of.. y'know, the Little General.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Didn't you used to call it the Little Major?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Yeah, but after Denise DeMarco, I had to promote it.
    • new scene
    • Scene 7

      A restaurant. Fun Bobby and Monica are ordering.

    • Waiter
      Can I get you something from the bar?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Yes, I would like something. [looks at Fun Bobby, changes her mind] No, no thank you.
    • Fun Bobby
      If... if you want to drink, it's OK with me, I've got to get used to it.
    • monica
    • Monica
      No, no really. I.. I wouldn't feel right about it. [to waiter] Just some water.
    • Fun Bobby
      So the light went out in my refrigerator...
    • monica
    • Monica
      [grabs waiter as he's leaving] I'd like a scotch on the rocks with a twist.
    • new scene
    • Scene 8

      Central Perk. Chandler is sitting on the couch between Russ and Ross, doing a crossword puzzle.

    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Hey, we're having some fun now, huh, Ross? Wanna do another one, huh Russ? OK... eleven letters, atomic element number 101... ends in ium.
    • Russ
      Dysprosium.
    • ross
    • Ross
      [condescendingly] Dysprosium? Try mendelevium.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      And weenie number two has it. Unless, of course, nine-down, Knights in White Satin was sung by the Doody Blues.
    • [Phoebe and Rachel are at the counter talking.]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      You don't see it? You actually don't see it?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      OK honey, you're dating Ross.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      No, Phoebs. I'm dating Russ.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Russ is Ross. Russ... Ross!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Steve... sleeve!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      OK, noone is named Sleeve.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Phoebe, what the hell are you talking about? Other than their names being similar, I'm sorry, I do not see what you're seeing.
    • [They look over at Russ and Ross.]
    • ross
    • Ross
      [to Russ] For your information, it's a card sharp, not a card shark.
    • Russ
      You could not be more wrong. You could try... but you would not be successful.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      OK, I'm gonna get some more coffee before the pinching and eye-poking begins.
    • Russ
      I know what your problem is.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh you do, do you?
    • Russ
      Um-hum, you're jealous.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Of... of what?
    • Russ
      You're jealous because I'm a real doctor.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hey, you're a doctor of gums. That's the smallest body part you can major in. It's like day one, floss. Day two, here's your diploma.
    • Russ
      Hey, you listen.
    • ross
    • Ross
      No, no, let me finish.
    • Russ
      No, let me finish.
    • ross
    • Ross
      No, you let me fini...
    • [Rachel walks up behind them.]
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hi.
    • Russ
      Hi.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ewww, ewww, ewww, ewww! [turns away]
    • new scene
    • Scene 9

      Ross, Phoebe, Rachel, and Chandler at Monica and Rachel's apartment.

    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Did Joey say what he was gonna go when he left?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No, I don't even think he knew. Hey, would you sleep with somebody to get a great job?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      I don't know. Who would I have to sleep with?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Me.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Why would I have to sleep with you?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      It's my game. You want the job or not?
    • [Monica enters from her bedroom.]
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Hey.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Morning.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Where ya goin'?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Bobby and I are going away for the weekend, remember?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Ooooohhhh.
    • [Monica pulls out a bag full of airline bottles of liquor.]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      What's with all the bottles of liquor?
    • ross
    • Ross
      What's going on, is... uh, Bobby drinking again?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh no no, this is not for him, this is for me. That way he's still sober but I find his stories about shoelaces much more amusing.
    • [Three slow knocks on the door.]
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh God, even his knock is boring.
    • [Monica answers the door. Its Fun Bobby.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      Hi. I'll be ready in just a second.
    • Fun Bobby
      Uh, can I talk to you a minute?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Sure.
    • [They both step out into the hall.]
    • Fun Bobby
      This is really hard for me to say.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh God, you fell off the wagon.
    • Fun Bobby
      Oh, no, no, it's about you.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What about me?
    • Fun Bobby
      I think you may have a drinking problem.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What these? [holding up liquor bottles] Oh, these are, um, for.. cuts and scrapes.
    • Fun Bobby
      Look, I am just not strong enough to be in a codependent relationship right now, OK?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh... shoot.
    • Fun Bobby
      Well, anyway, I hope we can be friends.
    • monica
    • Monica
      OK.
    • [They hug and kiss.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      Take care.
    • Fun Bobby
      You too.
    • [Fun Bobby leaves and Monica goes back inside.]
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What happened?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Well we... we kinda broke up.
    • Gang
      Awwwwwwww.
    • [Ross, Phoebe, Chandler, and Rachel all exchange money.]
    • monica
    • Monica
      [holding bottles] Does anybody want these?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I'll take one. Sometimes I like to hold stuff like this and pretend I'm a giant.
    • [Joey enters.]
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey.
    • Gang
      Hey!
    • ross
    • Ross
      How'd the callback go?
    • joey
    • Joey
      It was unbelievable! I walked in there and she was all over me.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      So what'd you do?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Well, I couldn't do it. I told her I didn't want to get the part that way.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Good for you.
    • joey
    • Joey
      But wait, wait, wait. Then, after I left her office, she caught up with me at the elevator and offered me an even bigger part.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      So... and?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Soooooo... you are now looking at Dr. Drake Ramore, neurosurgeon, recurring in at least four episodes!
    • Gang
      Allright!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Alright... I've got to go shower. [leaves]
    • [Phoebe, Ross, Rachel, Chandler exchange money again.]
    • CLOSING CREDITS
    • new scene
    • Scene 10

      Central Perk. Russ enters. Chandler and Phoebe are sitting on the couch.

    • Russ
      Hi.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh, hey.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hi.
    • Russ
      I guess you guys heard, Rachel dumped me.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Yeah, I'm sorry man.
    • Russ
      Oh, all she said was that I remind her too much of somebody. You have any idea who she's talking about?
    • [Chandler and Phoebe feign ignorance.]
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh I do, it's.... it's Bob Saget. She hates him.
    • Russ
      Oh.
    • [Julie... Ross's ex-girlfriend... enters.]
    • Julie
      Hey.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Hey!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Hey, Julie! Hey, how are you doing?
    • Julie
      Um, oh, I don't know. I mean, it's definitely weird not being with Ross, but I guess I'm doing OK. Actually I've got some of his stuff that he, um....
    • [Russ and Julie look at each other with love in their eyes. The music builds...]
    • END