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  •  /  Friends  /  S09E05 The One With Phoebe's Birthday Dinner


    • new scene
    • Scene 1

      Central Perk. All except Chandler, plus Emma.

    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh hey you guys, I couldn't get a reservation for the night of my birthday, so we have to do dinner Thursday night instead.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Thursday? But that's Halloween.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      So?
    • joey
    • Joey
      [It's just] So spooky, that's all.
    • ross
    • Ross
      So, so, is Mike coming to dinner?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No! It's my first birthday with a boyfriend, and he has to work. Uch, I get mad at him, but I think it's a little to soon to show my true colors.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Pheebs, I would make a reservation for five, because one of us has to stay home and watch Emma. (to Ross:) Which one of us should go to dinner?
    • ross
    • Ross
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, Rachel!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Actually, um, I was thinking maybe both of us could go.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, yay!
    • ross
    • Ross
      Thanks, I put a lot of extra thoughts on your gift.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Alright, okay, so we can all go now. That is fun. Hey, you know what? We all haven't been together the six of us in such a long time.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What are you talking about? We're all together right now.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Um, Mon, Chandler's not here.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh, dear god!
    • OPENING CREDITS
    • new scene
    • Scene 2

      Tulsa, a conference room. Chandler is chairing a group of eight people.

    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Good morning everyone, it's nice to see our team together for the first time. Now, before we get started, are there any questions? (colleague raises hand) Yes, Ken is it?
    • Ken
      That's right. Is it true, that the reason you are here in Tulsa is that you fell asleep in a meeting and took the job without realizing what you were saying yes to?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (laughs) Well, don't believe everything you hear, Ken. (both turning away to files) But yeah, that's true. Alright, let's get started, by take a look at last quarter's figures. (The female next to Chandler starts smoking, towards her:) Ah, Claudia, aren't you supposed to blow smoke up the bosses' ass?
    • Claudia
      I'm sorry. Does the smoke bother you?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No, no, no-no-no. I smoked for years, then I quit. Right now, I can't remember why. (to everyone:) You're not allowed to smoke in this office. Not right?
    • Claudia
      Yes, in Oklahoma it's legal to smoke in offices with fifteen people or less. (passing the pack) Would you like one?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Alright, lo'look. I don't smoke anymore. But if the rest of you want to light up, go ahead, it's fine. (everyone lights up) So you all smoke then? That's almost rude, that I'm not.
    • Ken
      That's not true. If you don't wanna smoke '
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (loud) Ken, please! No, I can't, I can't smoke. If I smoke, my wife would kill me.
    • Ken
      I'm sorry, but isn't your wife back in New York?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I always liked you, Ken. (takes a cigarette)
    • new scene
    • Scene 3

      The Bings'. Monica in bathrobe, merely covered. Someone's knocking at the door.

    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (from outside) Trick or treat! (It's obviously Halloween eve, the night of her birthday dinner.)
    • monica
    • Monica
      (opening the door) Hey!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Ooh, and treat it is. (Monica's breasts.)
    • monica
    • Monica
      Hmhmm. (ties up)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Wow, so glad I changed. Almost wore my ??? outfit that can't contain my breasts.
    • monica
    • Monica
      This is not, what I'm wearing. I'm ovulating and Chandler's gonna be home any minute, so I thought we would try before dinner.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Ohh. Oh wait! (Jis) you guys won't be late for my dinner, will you?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Believe me, Chandler and I have not seen each other in over a week. We'll probably be the first ones there.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      'kay, see you there. Happy humping! (outside meeting Chandler.) Hey'hey! Oh, wow, somebody smoked out here? Oh my god, don't people know, you're not allowed to smoke in public spaces?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Actually, in Oklahoma smoking is legal in all commune areas and offices with fewer than fifteen people.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      You smoked!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No! I just happened t'do a lot trivias about smoking in different states. For example, in Hawaii cigarettes are called Leyhallalookoos.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (smells at him) Chandler, you stink of cigarettes.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Uch, do you think, Monica is gonna be able smell it?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Are you kidding? The woman has the nose of a bloodhound ' and the breasts of a Greek goddess.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Pheebs?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (embarrassed) I'm gonna go. (leaves to stairs)
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (getting in) Okay, something to cover the smell ' Oven cleaner! (sprays himself, reads label) Unscented!
    • monica
    • Monica
      (naughty in doorway) Welcome home. I've missed you. join me in the bedroom?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      No thanks, I'm good.
    • monica
    • Monica
      (comes over) O-kay, so you wanna play it that way, do you?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (shrinks back) Right. You know what? Actually I just get off the plane, so I'm feeling kinda gross. Maybe I should just take a shower.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You don't need a shower.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (still backs away) Alright, the truth is, I soiled myself during some turbulences.
    • monica
    • Monica
      What do I smell? (sniffs him) I smell smoke. Huh'did you smoke?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Yes, but I just had one. Two. Two tiny cigarettes. Okay, five. A pack. Two pack'a'a carton. Three big fat cartons in two days. (How many cigarettes are there in one pack and how many packs in one carton in the US?) But it's over, I made a decision, I'm not gonna smoke anymore.
    • monica
    • Monica
      (gets a pack out of his jacket)
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      But, those are for you.
    • new scene
    • Scene 4

      Ross and Rachel's. Ross phones, Rachel and Emma are there.

    • ross
    • Ross
      Alright, we'll just, uh, see when you get here. Bye. (hangs up) Huh, that was my mom, she's stuck in terrible traffic.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Okay, well that's now the third sign that I should not leave Emma.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh, what were the other two?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Well, let's see. The first one is: I don't want to. And, you know, I'm not going.
    • ross
    • Ross
      I know, it's the first time, we're leaving the baby and ' hey, I know how hard it is for you, but ' but Emma is gonna be fine. My mom is gonna be with her. She's great with kids.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      She is?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Ya.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What about (?) Monica.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Hey, you only heard Monica's side of that. That little fatso was a terror.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ish. I just don't think I can bear it.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Rachel, I know that you can. And you should.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Uch.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Really, it would be good for you and in fact, why don't you, why don't you go ahead to the restaurant and I will wait for my mom and then I'll meet you there.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh-A.
    • ross
    • Ross
      No, no, really. You should go. Just go! Go! Go out! Really, the world is your oyster. Kick up the heels. Paint the town red. (Slang right?)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      You need to learn some new slang.
    • ross
    • Ross
      I'm serious. C'mon, you should go. Here. (shoves her outside, while she tries to stay) No, uh-uh, just go.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What ' Oh! (points inside)
    • ross
    • Ross
      No! No, you know what? (closes the door) You [can't get in there] (?), the baby's fine, now squam (?). Yeah, I told you, tell your story walking. (?)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      I was just going to say that I left my keys.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh, (door is locked) holy molly are we in a pickle now.
    • new scene
    • Scene 5

      The restaurant. Phoebe and Joey are sitting alone at a table for six.

    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Where is everyone? They're forty minutes late.
    • joey
    • Joey
      I know, u-uch.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      I'm starving. I know we were coming here tonight, I ate nothing all day.
    • joey
    • Joey
      What about me, he? Only had one lunch today.
    • Waiter
      (with British accent) Soo, are we expecting the rest of our party shortly?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Yes, they are expected presently. Yeah, yeah um, their arrival is in the offing.
    • Waiter
      Right. We do have a table for two available, perhaps you would be more comfortable.
    • joey
    • Joey
      No, they're comin', we're waitin' right here.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Joseph! (to waiter) Thou needn't worry, they shan't be long.
    • Waiter
      It's just that we do have some large parties waiting.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      One really does have a stick up one's ass. Doesn't one?
    • new scene
    • Scene 6

      The Bings'.

    • monica
    • Monica
      How can you smoke in this day of age? Do you not seen that ad with a little kid walks to grandpa, it's chilling.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I messed up, it was a meeting, everybody was smoking.
    • monica
    • Monica
      So what? Don't you have any will power?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Will power? I've watch home movies of you eating ding-dongs (?) without taking the tin foil off.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You said that was sexy!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      'kay, look: Can we just drop this? I'm not gonna smoke again.
    • monica
    • Monica
      That's right, because I forbid you to smoke again.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You forbid me?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Mhmm.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You know, I flew a long way t see my loving wife? Is she here by the way?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Don't joke (?) with me, okay? I'm very, very upset right now.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh, would you say this was the most upset you could be?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Yes.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Then, I might as well ' (grabs the cigarettes) do this (lights one, exhales). Not really sure what to do now.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Well, I'll tell you what we're gonna do: We are already late for Phoebe's birthday dinner, so you point out put out that cigarette, we're gonna put this fight on hold and go have sex.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Fine. What!?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Sex! This is the last day I'm ovulating, and when we don't do it now, we'll have to wait till next month. (walks towards bedroom)
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You serious? (follows)
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh yeah!
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Right, fine, I'll do it, but no talking.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Huh, and no cuddling.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      And no kissing your neck.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh good, I hate it when you do that
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      And lots of kissing your neck.
    • new scene
    • Scene 7

      Outside Ross and Rachel's.

    • ross
    • Ross
      Okay, well the ??? is not home.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      No. Uch.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh-oh, wait, my mother is gonna be here any minute. And she has the keys.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Alright, I can't, I can't wait that long. You have to do something'knock that door down!
    • ross
    • Ross
      I would, but I bruise like a peach. Besides, y'you know, everything is gonna be fine. The baby's sleeping.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What if she jumped out the bassinet?
    • ross
    • Ross
      Can't hold her own head up, but yeah jumped.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh my god, I left the water running.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Rach you did not leave the water running. Please, just pull yourself together, okay?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ah, did I leave the stove on?
    • ross
    • Ross
      You never cooked since 1996. (Actually Rachel cooked in '609 - TOW Ross Got High', first aired 1999-11-25.)
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Is the window open? Because if there's a window open, a bird could fly in there.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Oh my god, you know what, yeah, I think you're right. I think ' listen, listen!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ubb.
    • ross
    • Ross
      A pigeon, a pigeon. (previously scared Rachel turns away) No, no wait, no-no, an eagle flew in. Landed on the stove and caught fire. The baby, seeing this, jumps across the apartment to the mighty bird's aid. The eagle, however, misconstrues as an act of aggression and grabs the baby on its talon. Meanwhile the faucet fills the apartment with water. Baby and bird still up lays (?) are locked in a death grip, swirling around the whirl pool, that fills the apartment.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Boy, are you gonna be sorry if that's true.
    • new scene
    • Scene 8

      The restaurant with still just Phoebe and Joey.

    • Waiter
      Hello.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Hey.
    • Waiter
      It's been an hour. ??? be willing to reconsider switching to a smaller table.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Maybe we should just eat now.
    • Waiter
      You can't order until your entire party has arrived. Restaurant policy.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Wha-a how about this: Another table leaves, right? But there's still some food left on their place, okay, what's the restaurant's policy about people eatin' that?
    • Waiter
      Estrangement (?).
    • joey
    • Joey
      But it happens? (waiter leaves) I'm gotta go to the bathroom.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      No, you can't go. No-no-no, I can't hold this table on my own. If they ask me to move, I cave.
    • joey
    • Joey
      If you ask me to stay, I'll pee. (leaves)
    • Maitre D'
      Good evening, Miss. (Phoebe turns her head away) Miss? (from the opposite side) Miss? (she turns again) Miss!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Okay, fine, I'll move. Alright, you don't have to manhandle me. (gets up) Where? (he points at a smaller table) Okay. Thank you. Wach.
    • joey
    • Joey
      (returns to their old table where elderly people are sitting now, sits) Finally you guys made it. (looks up, turns left to Phoebe's chair) Pheebs, who the hell'uhuhh!
    • new scene
    • Scene 9

      The Bings' bedroom, Chandler is undressing, Monica in bed already.

    • monica
    • Monica
      Spend more time with the tie. That'll make a baby.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Look, I can't do this. I can't make luv to you while we're fighting this way.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh sure, now you're Mister Sensitivity. But when you wanted to have sex right after my uncle's funeral
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      That was a celebration of life. Alright, look, I'm not gonna do this. Alright, is this really the way you want a baby to be conceived?
    • monica
    • Monica
      No, you're right. Mnya, we shouldn't do it like this. Huch. For what it's worth, I'm, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have come down on you so hard about the smoking. So you had a few cigarettes, not the end of the world.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Mean it?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Yah.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You are incredible. Unless, I'I'm not gonna smoke again. And if I do, I promise, I will hide it so much better from you. (they kiss)
    • monica
    • Monica
      D'you want to?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Yeah, let's celebrate life!
    • monica
    • Monica
      'kay.
    • new scene
    • Scene 10

      Ms. Geller, Rachel and Ross storm into the apartment.

    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Och, god. (seeing Emma) Oh, thank god, you're okay. I'm so sorry we left you. Mom never gonna leave you again. Never ever ever again. Uch.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Great. So let's get going?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh no. I mean it. After what just happened, I'm never leaving her again.
    • Ms. Geller
      I understand, separation is hard. One time I was about to leave Ross to go to the beauty parlor and he got so upset, he took off all his clothes, tucked his ??? between his legs and cried out
    • ross
    • Ross
      Somehow over time it got easier to be apart from you.
    • new scene
    • Scene 11

      Bings in bed, finished.

    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Uhh. You are welcome.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You know what? Let's not talk.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      What?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Uch. I am still so mad at you for smoking.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      But you said you forgave me. It was just a couple of cigarettes'no big deal.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Oh, blablablabaybaybay.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Leave it.
    • monica
    • Monica
      I was just saying that because I was ovulating and you said you wouldn't have sex with me while we're fighting.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You tricked me to get me into bed?
    • monica
    • Monica
      That's right, I got mine.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I feel so used.
    • new scene
    • Scene 12

      Restaurant, still just the not-couple.

    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Well, I guess they're not coming. You wanna just order?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Thank you. (stands up and kisses her lips.) Waiter! 'lright, this is gonna be fast, so try to keep up: Risotto with the shaped truffles and the roasted rip steak with the golden Chanterelles and a Bordelaise sauce and that any that stuff I just said means snails. (Hope, *I* kept up.)
    • Waiter
      Er'does not.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Tomato tart and which of the pastas would you recommend?
    • Waiter
      Oh, they're both exclus'
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Both it is, thank you.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Oh, uh, again. Can I make a special request: Can you bring everything as soon as it's ready? Appetizers, entrees, we don't care.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (entering) Hey, hi, hi!
    • Waiter
      I'll just wait to put your order in.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      You guys are over an hour late. What happened to you two?
    • ross
    • Ross
      I'm so sorry '
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      We got locked out of the apartment, we '
    • joey
    • Joey
      That's a great story'can I eat it?
    • ross
    • Ross
      And then Rachel wasn't sure she could leave the baby.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      N-it wasn't easy, but it's your birthday and I did what I got to do.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      And that's Judy over there at the bar with Emma?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh honey, this is for the best, thus I'm not distracted, worrying about Emma, how she's doing at home and I'm being completely here with you and, oh, she spit up!
    • ross
    • Ross
      What?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      She spit up. Judy! She spi'Judy! Look alive, Judy! (they sit down) Thank you.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Thanks. Oh.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh, ooh, everything looks delicious. What should I ha-ave? What should I have?
    • joey
    • Joey
      (mumbling) Never hit a woman. Never hit a woman.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Y'know this ??? is incredible.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Ross bruises like a peach. He bruises like a peach.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Okay, I'll have the fixed salad and the duck.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Yah, I'll have the soup and the salmon.
    • joey
    • Joey
      And remember whatever comes up first. Okay? And hurry, because '
    • monica
    • Monica
      (entering with husband) Happy birthday!
    • joey
    • Joey
      Son of a bitch!
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Wher-where have you been?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Well, we had a little fight.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I would never lie to get someone into bed.
    • monica
    • Monica
      You used to tell girls you were a Kennedy. (being sat down) Ooh, uh, thanks. Wow, little tight, isn't it? How d'you get a bigger table? You-you had a big table, but they made you move. Huh-huh, shut up Monica. Whoo, I suppose that Chandler will have the smoked duck.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      I suppose that Monica will have the ' manipulative shrew.
    • Waiter
      I'll give you another minute.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Why are you going? He said, she wanted the shrew! (runs after the waiter)
    • ross
    • Ross
      Rach, c'mon, Emma is fine. You're turning into an obsessive mother. Okay, you need to stop.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Y'guys ever heard the story about when Rosses mom went to the beauty salon?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      You mean the lully story?
    • ross
    • Ross
      (childish) Huh-huh, they already know it.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      You guys, we've been waiting for you for a long time, maybe you should order.
    • joey
    • Joey
      (returned) No, no, it's okay, I already told the waiter what they want.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Why would you do that?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Chandler, control your woman!
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (lifts for a toast) Okay, as everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast ' to Phoebe. She dropped her sock.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Aw ' what?
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      N-no, Emma dropped her sock.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Mom's here? I wanted to have lunch with her today, she told me she was out of town.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby's sock is on the ground.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      's a good toast.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      (to Ross) Could you please get her attention?
    • ross
    • Ross
      W-oa ' Mommy! (gestures to his not understanding mother)
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (getting up) Oh, for god's sake, Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! (everybody scared) I'm sorry, was that rude? Di-did my, my li-little outburst blunt (?) the hideousness (?) that is this evening? Look, I know, you all have a lot going on, but all I wanted to do was have dinner with my friends on my birthday. And you are all so late and you didn't even have the courtesy to call. (her cellular rings) Well, it's too late now.
    • ross
    • Ross
      Well, ??? think that's us?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      well, this is, this is, this is not over! (on phone) Hello?
    • joey
    • Joey
      (to Chandler and Monica) Well, what is going on with you two?
    • monica
    • Monica
      Uch, you see, I'm ovulating.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Oh yeah, that's what she says. But maybe you're not ovulating at all, maybe it's just a clever ruse to get me into bed.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Yes smokie, that is what it was. I just can't get enough.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      (to Joey) You not gonna believe this: She lied! She tricked me into having sex with her.
    • joey
    • Joey
      So? Did have sex, right?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      What's the matter with me? Why I'm such a girl?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      (returns) Okay, that was Mike.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Phoebe, hi, we're so sorry. You're totally right. We are here one hundred per cent and we love you and we are ready to start your birthday celebration.
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Mhuh, guys, that means the world to me. Huh, nkay, I'm gonna take off.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      What?
    • phoebe
    • Phoebe
      Oh, I love you guys too, but Mike got off work early. Wait. Wait, I'm not t'not that kind of girl that just ditches her friends to be with her boyfriend. You know what? I am. Bye guys! (waves to the bar) Judy! Bye.
    • rachel
    • Rachel
      Oh thank god, if Phoebe's going, can we please take Emma home?
    • ross
    • Ross
      You know, I think that's a good idea'our babysitter just pounded in another Chardonnet. (both get up) Bye, y'guys.
    • monica
    • Monica
      Bye.
    • joey
    • Joey
      See ya. Well, this is just us.
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      Mhum.
    • monica
    • Monica
      So, I'm, I'm probably still ovulating. Do you want to give it another try?
    • chandler
    • Chandler
      So you never had sex with a Kennedy, have you?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Do, do you gonna do it now?
    • monica
    • Monica
      We don't have much time. Once the egg descended the oviduct '
    • joey
    • Joey
      No-ohoh. (the Bings leave, the waiter comes)
    • Maitre D'
      I sincerely hope the rest of your party is returning.
    • joey
    • Joey
      Nah, just me. All alone. (all the food is served) Dinner for six for one, uh, you boys are about to see something really special.
    • CLOSING CREDITS
    • new scene
    • Scene 13

      continues, Joey finished everything.

    • Waiter
      How was everything, sir?
    • joey
    • Joey
      Excellent. The shrew in particular was exclusive.
    • Waiter
      Well, I hope, you got some room left.
    • Waiters
      (with birthday cake, singing) Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear '
    • joey
    • Joey
      Joey! Joey.
    • Waiters
      ' Joey, happy birthday to you.
    • joey
    • Joey
      That's the best birthday ever.
    • END