What's with the age gap hiring policy at most movie theaters? Didja ever notice, they never hire anyone between the ages of fifteen... and eighty, you know what I mean? Like, the girl that sells you the ticket, she's ten. Then there's the guy who rips the ticket, he's a hundred and two. So, what happened in the middle, there? You couldn't find anybody? It's like they want to show you how life comes full circle. You're fifteen, you sell the tickets. Then you leave, you go out, you have a family, kids, marriage, career, grandchildren, eighty years later, you're back in the same theater three feet away. Ripping tickets. Took you eighty years to move three feet.
As impeccable and precise in his business dealings as he is with his apartment
On consideration, Jerry decides to take the 11 o'clock spot and skip the movie. Jerry is on his way out the door when Buckles spots him
At the Paragon Theater, George joins the end of a queue. He taps the shoulder of the man in front of him
And you're no Jack Kennedy. Jerry is understandably unimpressed. He tries to escape, but Buckles won't let him. Jerry is on his way to the theater to tell his friends he can't make it, then back to the Improv. Buckles offers to join him and split the fare. ``I've got time! It'll give us a chance to know each other a little better!'' Elaine joins George in the queue
This touches a raw nerve
Kramer just asks for his ticket, but George doesn't have them
George addresses the man in front of him
George gloats, knowing what the answer is going to be
Instant double-take
Misunderstanding number three. George goes to get tickets, leaving Elaine and Kramer to talk behind his back
Let him who is without sin, Kramer
The movie has sold out. ``Real good, George. Real good.'' It's now 10:20, and Kramer suggests they go watch the 10:45 showing of "CheckMate" at the Paradise. Elaine enters whine mode
But she gives in. New plan. George and Elaine will get tickets at the Paradise, while Kramer waits at the Paragon to tell Jerry of the change in plans. But Kramer can't keep his eye off the Papaya King sign, flashing, beckoning, practically begging... Jerry suffers through Buckles' telling of his life story in the taxi
Jerry can't stand it. Buckles somehow drifted onto the subject of fish and how much he hates it
At the Paradise, George succeeds in obtaining the tickets, and he joins Elaine in the ticket-holders line. (Right?
Yeah, what's your point
The line begins to move. George offers to wait outside for K+J
With extreme reluctance, Elaine goes on ahead to save seats
The taxi is stuck in traffic. Jerry bawls out Buckles for choosing 55th on a Saturday night. Buckles considers how various famous people would react to be stuck in traffic, using Jerry as an unwilling guinea pig for his material
Apparently, not
George comes in; J+K haven't appeared. Elaine sends George to the Paragon to give Kramer his and Jerry's tickets. Throughout the conversation, Elaine fends off would-be claim-jumpers
George returns to one of his favorite topics
Kramer stands, mesmerized by the sign that reads, ``100% pure fresh beef. Tastier than Filet Mignon.'' He rushes to the ticket booth
Elaine is accosted from all sides
She can't take it any longer
George reaches the ticket booth of the Paragon
George leaves, unsuccessful
It's not like he's asking for a ride to the airport or anything
Jerry sanely declines. Jerry doesn't see any of his friends, so he figures they're inside. He'll go in to tell them he can't join them
Brutal honesty once again saves the day
Jerry pays his half of the fare then approaches the entrance to the Paragon
Just after Jerry goes inside, Kramer clomps to the ticket booth at warp speed, clutching a precious Papaya King hot dog in his hand
Behind Elaine, a women chats loudly with her friend
Elaine collects her things and leaves
At the entrance to the Paradise Twin, George is stopped by the usher
George sifts through his pockets, going on about how he never needed a stub before
Unable to find his stub, George gives him Kramer's ticket. The ticket-taker tears the ticket and gives George the stub. George goes into the ``CheckMate'' theater just as Elaine leaves it through the other door. Like two dips, passing in the night
Various movie patrons tell George to shut up
He is quickly shouted down, making his escape through the exit. The exit to the street
IN THE THEATER AT THE PARAGON, JERRY WHISPERS ``ELAINE'' AND, HEARING NO RESPONSE, GIVES UP.
Something about this preview attracts Jerry's attention. Not sure exactly what, though..
Meanwhile, Kramer gives up waiting outside the Paragon. Seconds thereafter, Jerry rushes out of the theater and hails a cab. Or tries to
ELAINE REACHES THE CONCESSIONS STAND AND HAS TO DEAL WITH THE PERKY CLERK.
Leaving the inanities of modern marketing aside, we switch to Jerry, still outside trying to hail a cab. He finally gets one. The driver speaks with a Russian accent
George once again tries to get past the ticket-taker
George empties his pockets in a quest for a ticket stub. No dice
George goes past the concessions stand, not seeing Elaine, who is searching her pocketbook for change to pay for her popcorn and drink
George dwells at the ``Rochelle Rochelle'' sign for what must be the 5th time this episode. Kramer heads straight into the theater
Kramer lankily stumbles into the seat, but finds the fit uncomfortable
Jerry nervously glances at his watch
Elaine returns to the theater, arms laden with popcorn and soda, trying to find her seat. Various patrons tell her to sit down already. She is finally shouted down and pushed out of the aisle, causing her to spill most of her popcorn in the process. George sits in a half-empty theater watching ``Rochelle Rochelle''. Not a female audience member in sight.
George is clearly waiting to see Rochelle's other buttons
A tall man sits down in front of George, blocking his view of Rochelle's Christmas cards. Elaine stumbles to the ticket-taker, trying to shake popcorn out of her hair.
Elaine plods off, then realizes she had something else to say
Meanwhile, at a service station, the taxi driver assures Jerry that they will be leaving very soon. He'll just go across the street to buy a cigarette
Off-screen, we hear appreciative applause
Jerry spots Buckles
George and Elaine watch ``Rochelle Rochelle'' in different parts of the theater. Also there are Jerry and Buckles. George and Buckles seem to be enjoying the movie; Jerry and Elaine can't deal with it
George turns, as does Jerry
Elaine's face lights up
Another prized Seinfeld moment, soon to be copycatted around the country
The music from the movie continues over the next, heart-rending scene..
Jerry, Elaine, and George fill each other in on their respective miseries out in the lobby
Kramer wanders out of ``CheckMate'', his newly-found coat draped casually over his shoulders. Jerry looks through his wallet
