S02E01

Ciao

Full screenplay script transcript for The White Lotus S02E01: Ciao

48 Scenes1318 Lines

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Anyways, I feel like

Guest

I can't even go back

and get married to him.

Guest

Pretend like

Guest

we never have to go back

to America.

I think so.

Staff

I know, I think...

Guest

Did you guys just get here?

Guest

Yeah, we... we just

in flew this morning.

Oh, I'm so jealous.

We leave in a few hours.

Guest

So, did you have a good time?

We had the best time.

Guest

Have you guys been here before?

No.

Guest

The hotel's perfect,

and the staff is excellent.

The food is amazing.

Staff

I've heard.

Guest

And the wine. I mean...

We are so excited.

Italy's just so romantic.

Oh, you're gonna die.

Guest

They're gonna have

to drag you out of here.

Oh, I'm sure.

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Well, I'm gonna get

in the water one last time.

But...

Guest

you guys are gonna

have such an amazing trip.

Staff

Thank you. Nice to meet you.

Guest

Thanks.

Staff

You too.

Guest

Safe travels.

Staff

Thanks. Bye!

Guest

Bye!

Guest

Oh, what the fuck was that?

Holy fuck.

Oh, my fucking God.

Holy fucking shit.

Guest

Help! Help! Help! Help!

Guest

Help! Help!

Guest

Help!

Valentina.

You must stay behind there.

Staff

All or a!

Guest

Oh.

Mia.

Guest

Huh?

Signori Di Grasso.

Welcome to the White Lotus.

Guest

I am Valentina,

the resort manager.

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Staff

Ah.

Guest

How was your boat ride?

It was bellissimo.

Guest

I mean, I'm impressed

that you are even here.

Guest

Why are you impressed?

Guest

It's a long trip

Guest

from Los Angeles,

Guest

and you are quite old, no?

Guest

And bring you

to your beautiful rooms.

Guest

Can I offer you

Guest

a glass of Prosecco?

Oh. Thank you, dear.

You're a sight for sore eyes.

Thank you.

Staff

Cheers.

Guest

This way.

Staff

Thank you.

Guest

You like it?

Yeah. Thanks.

Hello, darling.

Oh.

Hey. Welcome to Sicily.

Mr. and Mrs. Sullivan.

Guest

You must be Mr. and Mrs. Spiller?

Guest

How was your flight?

Staff

It was fine.

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Guest

Yeah.

But they did lose Cameron's bag in Rome.

Oh, never transfer through Rome.

Fiumicino always loses bags.

Oh.

Guest

You should have

flown through Munich.

Staff

Thanks for the tip.

Guest

Yeah. Next time.

Staff

You're welcome.

Guest

Thank you.

Guest

Please, some Italian Prosecco?

Staff

Let's toast, people.

Guest

No, thanks.

Staff

I think I'll just wait.

Guest

Harper... You don't want one?

No. I don't want one.

Guest

They wanna do a

Guest

toast. Can you hold the glass for me?

I haven't eaten in six hours.

Staff

I don't need any more drinks.

Guest

Sorry.

Just hold it.

Staff

Sorry.

Guest

That's okay.

Staff

Cheers. We made it.

Guest

Cheers.

Guest

Welcome

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to the White Lotus in Sicily.

Mm. Thank you.

Guest

If your bag will ever arrive,

Staff

we'll let you know right way.

Guest

Okay.

If you believe in miracles.

Okay, thank you.

You're welcome.

Guest

So, you don't like Prosecco?

Staff

No, no, it's fine. Thank you.

Guest

Yeah.

Staff

Okay. Okay. Thank you.

Guest

Okay, careful.

Ah! Ah! Oh.

Guest

Mrs. McQuoid-Hunt!

Ooh.

Guest

Welcome

to the White Lotus in Sicily.

You guys just really...

Just pull out all the stops.

You really do.

Guest

Whenever I stay

Guest

at a White Lotus,

Guest

I always have

a memorable time. Always.

Guest

And you are

in our Blossom Circle.

Guest

So, you are

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very important to us.

Guest

Mm. But I was a Petal,

Guest

and I've worked

my way up to Blossom. Yeah.

Guest

You know that your husband

Guest

is already here?

Good. Because...

Guest

He hasn't been responding

to my texts.

Guest

Shall we?

Guest

Yeah, okay. Okay,

Guest

Portia, do you get service here?

Guest

Yeah, I think

we both have full service.

Guest

Maybe we could take it

to AT&T or something.

Wow.

This hotel is so cool.

Guest

Well, originally,

it was a convent.

Honey, check out this view.

Staff

Whoa. Is that a volcano?

Guest

Mount Etna.

Guest

Hey, what is with these

Guest

head things?

We keep seeing them everywhere.

Testa di Moro.

Staff

Testa di Moro?

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Guest

Yeah. Well, the story is

Guest

a Moor came here a long time ago

and seduced a local girl.

Guest

But then she found out

Guest

that he had a wife

and children back home.

Guest

So, because he lied to her,

she cut his head off.

Staff

Oh.

Guest

Jesus.

Guest

So if you put one

Guest

of those outside of your house,

Guest

what are you saying?

Guest

If you come into my house,

don't fuck my wife.

Guest

It's a warning

to husbands, babe.

Guest

Screw around and you'll end up

buried in the garden.

Staff

Uh-oh.

Guest

Oh, before I forget.

I'll show you a special feature.

Staff

Cool.

Guest

If I open this door,

you can connect the two rooms.

Staff

Should I show you?

Guest

Oh! Yeah, cool.

No, no, that's okay.

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I doubt we'll use that.

Okay.

Guest

I mean, it's possible

at some point. I don't know.

Guest

It's good to have

Guest

the option, yeah?

Staff

Yeah.

Guest

Yeah.

You never know.

Staff

Guys, we did it!

Guest

Yeah!

Guest

Come on! We're finally here!

Guest

We've been talking

about this forever.

Staff

This is awesome.

Guest

Oh! I'm so happy we're here.

Staff

It's gonna be great.

Guest

Yeah.

Yeah, totally.

Staff

Let me show you your rooms.

Guest

Yeah!

Let's go.

Staff

You go first.

Guest

All right, guys. See you later.

Yeah. See you.

Guest

What?

Oh. I should tell you.

Guest

Both my parents

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were born in Sicily.

Staff

Oh.

Guest

Yeah, they came

to the States as children.

Guest

Yeah, so we are Sicilian,

just like you.

Although I'm not from Sicily.

I am from Milan.

Guest

Oh, you do have more

of a Northern look.

Beautiful hazel eyes.

Wonderful smile.

Staff

You're very kind.

Guest

You must be very popular.

Staff

All right, Dad.

Guest

Ah.

Guest

Anyway, we're here because

Guest

we're gonna visit the town

Staff

my grandmother's from.

Guest

Oh!

Guest

It's a little town,

uh, Testa dell'Acqua.

Yeah, that sounds very special.

Guest

Hopefully, um,

Guest

we can find some people there

Guest

who can speak English, you know,

Guest

maybe help us track down

some distant relatives.

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'Cause we definitely

don't speak Italian.

Oh, you should come, Isabella.

You could be our translator.

We need you.

Staff

Dad.

Guest

Hmm?

Leave her alone.

We'll take it from here.

Okay, thank you.

Guest

Shall I show you how

Guest

to close the curtains?

Guest

There's a button

over there on the...

That's okay.

We'll figure it out.

I'd like to know.

Guest

Where is this button, Isabella?

Guest

Dad! I'm gonna help

Guest

you find it, okay?

Staff

Thank you very, very much.

Guest

Thank you. Thank you very much.

Staff

Thank you.

Guest

You're very lovely.

Thank you.

Guest

They are lucky

to have you working here.

Be our translator...

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You slammed the door

Guest

in that poor girl's face!

You were harassing her.

Staff

How? I was not.

Guest

You kinda were. And farting.

It's the Prosecco.

Guest

Okay. Albie and I

are gonna go to our rooms.

Guest

We'll come back for you

Guest

in a bit. You gonna be okay?

Staff

Uh...

Guest

Great.

Guest

Why did we do this?

It's nice, Dad.

It's a nice thing to do.

I got a migraine.

I'm gonna go lay down.

Guest

Okay. Well, I'm probably

gonna head down to the pool.

Guest

Um, and then what time

did you wanna meet up for...

Guest

The most ancient art

is 14th century.

Staff

Oh, my God. Really?

Guest

Yeah. Oh.

Staff

Your missing husband is here.

Guest

Oh!

Staff

Oh, ho!

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Guest

Hey.

Guest

Hi!

Staff

How was the flight? Mm.

Guest

I missed you so much.

Guest

Hey, uh, yeah, you know

I texted you a bunch of times.

And you never texted me back.

I know, I know. I'm sorry.

Guest

We just had a flare-up

at work, it was...

Guest

Shall I show

you your room, or...

Oh. Yeah, definitely.

Guest

What the hell is she doing here?

Guest

What?

Yeah, uh, well, look.

I'm traveling by myself...

Guest

You bring your assistant

Guest

to a vacation with your husband?

Guest

Anything you need,

Guest

I'll be there. Okay?

Guest

Well, I just don't know

what the big deal is.

Guest

I mean, I don't know

why you're so bothered.

Guest

Because I said no!

Guest

Because it's supposed

to be romantic.

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Because it's a vacation,

in Sicily, for us.

I mean it's...

Guest

I mean,

Guest

it's not like she's, like,

Guest

gonna be in our bed

Guest

and stuff, you know?

Staff

I mean, she has her own room.

Guest

Tanya.

Get rid of her.

All right, I'll get rid of her.

Guest

I'll get rid of her. All right?

Staff

All right.

Guest

Put her on a plane.

Hey. Um...

You're gonna have to get lost.

Okay. Yeah.

Guest

So, what do you mean?

Guest

I'd see you in a week, then?

No, no, no, no.

Guest

I want you to stay... stay close,

'cause I might need you.

Guest

But just lay low

Guest

and... and not come out

Guest

of your room. Okay?

Guest

I gotta go. I gotta go!

I did it. I did it.

Oh. Hi, Portia.

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Do you want a drink?

I'm hungry.

Guest

Well, we have these

little... little things here.

Guest

I just think it's like,

Guest

you sold your company,

Guest

you got rich,

Guest

and now he's your best friend?

That's just...

Guest

Are you taking

Guest

that side of the bed?

I always sleep on that side.

Guest

Okay. Which is it a big deal?

Guest

Yeah, I wanna sleep

on my side of the bed.

Okay.

I'll sleep over there.

Yeah, I think that's better.

Guest

Also, they're so

Guest

touchy-feely. Right?

Guest

Like, do you notice that?

It feels performative.

Staff

Like, who does that?

Guest

Happily married couples?

Guest

Couples that have been

Guest

married for five years?

No way. It feels fake.

You're so quick to judge people.

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Yeah, people that brag

Guest

about taking helicopters

Olivia

to the Hamptons

Olivia

and being friends

with Jeff Bezos. I mean...

Olivia

Look, Cameron

Olivia

is the kinda guy who,

Olivia

if you can put up

Olivia

with him for five minutes,

you can put up with him forever.

He is consistent.

Olivia

A consistent douche?

Yeah. He's crazy, it's funny.

Guest

Was he like that in college?

Staff

Way worse.

Staff

Why were you

Staff

even friends with him?

Staff

We weren't friends,

we were roommates.

And then, you know how it is.

Staff

You kind of become friends,

and now we're friends.

Staff

At some point,

Staff

he is gonna approach you

Staff

with some kind

Staff

of money-making scheme

Staff

or some kind of favor

or something.

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There's a reason

they invited us here.

Well, that's my prediction.

So, we'll see.

Staff

Can you just please

Staff

try to make an effort?

Staff

Or else this is gonna

be a very awkward week.

Staff

When do I ever

Staff

make things awkward?

Could you put these...

These are hers.

Staff

Just put them on the couch

or the... anywhere. Thank you.

Staff

Grazie! Thank you!

Staff

Hey!

Staff

What?

Well, we got here in one piece.

Staff

My dad's not in the best shape

Staff

and he's already getting

on my nerves, but...

Staff

I'm in the middle

Staff

of something, Dom, okay?

Guest

I'm gonna go.

Staff

Okay.

Um, well...

Staff

I was thinking of you. You know?

Staff

We planned this together

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and I, uh,

just really wish you were here.

Yeah, right.

Okay. Whatever, Dom.

No. Not whatever.

Yes, whatever.

Staff

Just fuck off!

Staff

Okay. Um,

Staff

listen, Cara is not answering

my calls.

Staff

Well, she doesn't want

Staff

to talk to you, so,

I... I don't know.

Staff

Well, you should

encourage her to talk to me.

Staff

You know what? I'm

not getting involved in that.

Staff

But you are getting involved,

Staff

or why else would

Staff

she be mad at me?

Staff

Because of this latest

Staff

fucking bullshit, Dom!

Staff

And everything else over

Staff

the last ten fucking years!

Staff

Do you really think you

Staff

should be telling her all this?

Staff

Why not?

Staff

I have nothing to be ashamed of!

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And I'm honest.

Staff

I don't keep fucking secrets

Staff

from my family!

Staff

You should try it sometime!

Well, Albie's here.

He's not upset.

Staff

Yes, he fucking is!

Staff

He's just... he just doesn't want

to fight you.

Staff

He's a sweet,

sensitive young man.

Staff

And I honestly don't know

how it happened.

Staff

Sure as hell

didn't get it from you.

Okay. Jesus. Um...

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for everything.

And I still love you...

Shut the fuck up, Dom.

Staff

Shut up with the fucking

Staff

sorrys already, okay? Enough!

Okay.

Staff

I'll let you know

how it all goes.

Staff

I don't fucking care, Dom!

I've wasted enough of my life.

Staff

I don't want you

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calling me anymore!

Oh, my God, please.

Staff

It's fucking done! Okay?

Leave me alone.

Staff

Seriously! Fuck you!

Staff

Go fuck yourself. You fucking

Staff

piece of fucking shit!

This is such a fucked situation.

Staff

I feel like I've just been stuck

Staff

at home, just doom-scrolling

Staff

on my phone

Staff

the last three years,

Staff

and I finally get out

of there...

Staff

and I'm in Italy,

Staff

and she just told me

Staff

that I have to stay in my room

Staff

the whole time!

They're both fucking psycho.

Staff

It's fucked! Like,

Staff

the job is a joke!

Guest

Then quit.

Staff

She's a f... She's a mess.

She's a miserable mess.

Staff

If I had a half

Staff

a billion dollars,

I would not be miserable.

Staff

I would be enjoying my life!

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It's... so unfair,

and I'm so tired.

Oh, don't worry about her.

Just go get some dick.

I know! That's...

I know! That's what I...

That's what I wanted.

I wanna do...

Staff

get thrown around

Staff

by some hot Italian guy,

Staff

and now I'm just gonna be

sitting in my room eating pasta.

Staff

The menu's all pasta!

I'm gonna be so bloated.

Guest

This sucks.

Staff

Oh, shit. Portia.

Guest

Portia, I gotta get to work.

Staff

Oh, right. Okay.

Love you.

Guest

Love you. Text you later.

Staff

Bye!

Bye.

Staff

Hey, Harper,

I just realized.

Staff

I know someone

that knows you from law school.

Uh, Kevin Kourepenos.

He actually says hi.

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Do you want me to say hi?

Yeah, yeah, sure.

Staff

Um, tell him I said hi,

Staff

and congrats

on not getting disbarred.

Okay. I'll tell him.

So, you do employment law.

So interesting.

Guest

Mm-hmm.

Staff

What is that exactly?

Staff

Um, we, you know,

Staff

we take on clients

Staff

that are suing their employers

Staff

for discrimination,

Staff

sexual harassment,

Staff

wrongful termination,

stuff like that.

Amazing.

Guest

What? What is that face?

Staff

No, no, no.

Nothing. Just, um...

Staff

We've been dealing

Staff

with a bunch

of bogus claims lately.

Guest

I mean, everyone has.

Staff

Ah! Hmm.

Staff

I mean, even when they

Staff

have zero merit

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and they get thrown out

Staff

in summary judgment,

Staff

you still have to go through

Staff

all the depos

and the internal investigations.

It's a total time suck.

Staff

Not to mention a huge waste

of money. I mean...

God.

Mm.

Well, they're not all bogus.

Guest

No.

Staff

No! God, no. Fuck.

Of course they're not.

Staff

Harper, no,

of course they're not.

Guest

I'm sorry.

Staff

No, no, no. It's fine.

Sorry.

All good.

I bet you're really tough.

Staff

I bet your clients

Staff

are really happy

to have you in their corner.

Staff

Yeah. God,

wouldn't wanna mess with you.

She's like the star of her firm.

Wins every case.

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Of course you are.

Staff

Are you okay?

Yeah, I'm... I'm fine.

Staff

I... I just am dealing

with some...

Work stuff.

It's... It's nothing.

It's dumb...

Thank you for asking.

Staff

I think I saw you

Staff

and your cute grandfather

on the boat on the way in.

Guest

Yeah. I... I saw you, too.

Staff

Yeah.

Guest

I'm Portia.

Staff

Albie.

Guest

Hey. Yeah.

Staff

Hey.

Guest

Where are you from?

Staff

Los Angeles.

Guest

Cool.

Staff

Yeah. What about you?

San Francisco.

I love San Francisco.

It's beautiful.

Yeah. Yeah.

Staff

I... I actually spent

Staff

a lot of time there

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because I went

to a school nearby.

Staff

Oh, yeah? What school?

I... went to... Stanford.

Don't be so ashamed.

Wha... I... I'm not, it's just...

I went to Chico State, so...

Oh, cool.

Staff

Yeah. "Cool."

Cool.

Guest

Uh, what do you do now?

Staff

Um, for work?

Yeah.

Staff

I... I act... I work

Staff

for this company

Staff

that does urban

planning consulting.

Hmm.

Staff

I'm just an intern

at this point, so...

Staff

So you can go

Staff

on vacation for a week

Guest

and no one gives a shit.

Staff

Basically. Yeah.

Oh. There's your grandfather.

He's truly such an adorable man.

Yeah. He's a lot...

Staff

My dad and I brought him here

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because we're Sicilian...

Or we have Sicilian heritage.

Um, our last name's Di Grasso.

Staff

And we're taking him

Staff

to the town where his, um,

grandmother was born.

Cool. That's... so nice.

Staff

Oh, my God!

Staff

Your grandfather just fell!

Oh, no.

Staff

Nonno! Nonno, are you okay?

Guest

Huh?

Staff

You okay?

Guest

Yeah, no, no. I'm fine. I...

Staff

Sir?

I tripped.

Guest

Did you hit your head or anything?

Staff

Oh, my gosh.

Guest

No, no. No, no.

Staff

Your hand, it's...

Guest

It's fine, it's fine.

Staff

Are you okay?

Uh, oh, no, darling, thank you.

Guest

Hello.

Staff

Hi.

Staff

Are you... are you sure

Staff

you're good?

I mean, I'm so sorry you fell.

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Just came to see the view,

I mean...

Yeah, I'll...

I'll walk with you, Nonno.

Guest

There's a good view this way. Come on.

Staff

Huh? Okay.

Oh, my hat.

Oh, I'll get... Yeah. Oh.

Yeah.

Guest

Here you go.

Staff

Okay.

Uh, maybe I'll see you around.

Guest

Yeah. Yeah, I'll... I'm just...

Staff

Okay.

No, I'm fine. I'm fine.

Guest

Gonna get a drink.

Staff

Who's the girl?

Hi.

Staff

Right now?

Staff

Hey, where you going?

Staff

Oh, don't you want me

Staff

to wash up first?

I got swamp crotch.

Yeah.

God, he's always thinking of me.

Staff

Totally disregard

my text about the Ambien.

I have located my Ambien.

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Guest

Oh, my gosh! I'm so glad.

Staff

Thank God.

Staff

'Cause we don't have any,

so I'm sorry about that.

Staff

Oh. Really? You guys

Staff

don't take sleeping pills?

No.

Guest

Ever?

Staff

Nope.

Guest

You have trouble sleeping?

Staff

Mm.

Guest

Mm-hmm.

Staff

Yeah.

Staff

Why?

Staff

Why can't you sleep?

Staff

Just, like work stuff?

Yeah, but also just...

Staff

I don't know, just

everything that's going on...

...in the world.

Staff

What do you mean?

Staff

What's going on?

Staff

Oh, I don't know. Just,

like, the end of the world.

Guest

Oh. No, Harper!

Staff

Oh, come on!

Staff

The world's not ending,

it's not that bad.

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Honestly, Cam and I don't even

watch the news anymore.

Yeah.

Guest

You don't follow the news?

Staff

No.

Guest

What?

Staff

Like, I'm just so over

Staff

the whole news cycle, you know?

It's... it's like, gimme a break.

Staff

They're just trying

to freak everybody out.

Staff

Yeah. They're just polarizing

Staff

society by making us

Staff

glued to their apocalyptic

Staff

soap opera, you know?

Guest

It's like...

Staff

Yeah. And even if it was

Staff

as bad as they say it is,

Guest

I mean what can you really do, you know?

Staff

Right.

We vote, we donate money.

You can't obsess.

Guest

Did you vote, babe? Be honest.

Staff

I did.

Doesn't matter.

Guest

I don't think you did.

Staff

I think I did. I did.

I don't know.

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Mm. Okay, so you guys

don't watch the news.

Staff

Um... What do you do,

Staff

like, all day?

Staff

Oh. Well, I mean,

I'm... I'm home with the kids.

Guest

I mean, mostly. Yep.

Staff

Oh, right. Of course. Right.

We do a lot of Dateline.

I love it.

Husbands murdering their wives.

Happens a lot on vacation.

Scuba diving.

Staff

He'll just unplug her oxygen

while she's underwater.

Happens more than you think.

Staff

Why... why are you looking at me?

Staff

Why are we all looking at you?

Yeah.

Staff

Cameron really likes

to watch macho reality TV.

The guys are really ugly.

Staff

Oh, my God. That sounds

so bad, but they are.

Staff

Honey, the people on Dateline

Staff

aren't exactly

attractive either.

Staff

At least

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they're murdering each other.

Staff

What do you watch, Ethan?

Staff

Uh, what do we watch?

Like, documentaries.

Ted Lasso, sometimes.

Guest

We love Ted Lasso.

Staff

Love Ted Lasso. Gotta.

Guest

Mm.

Staff

Oh, you like it?

Guest

Yeah, man.

Staff

Yes, of course.

Guest

So likable, right?

Staff

Yeah.

Guest

I don't watch Ted Lasso.

Staff

No?

Guest

Yeah, such a good guy.

Staff

Yeah.

Staff

So much content now. It's like

Staff

there's billions of shows,

everyone's trying to keep up.

Guest

It's kinda suffocating, honestly. Yeah.

Staff

Too much.

It's too much.

Staff

It's like we're all

Staff

entertaining each other

Staff

while the world burns, right?

Staff

We're all just zombies, you

know, like...

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Hmm.

I love a binge.

I don't. Yeah...

Anyway.

Okey do key. Well...

Staff

If I can't get a swim in,

Staff

I may as well get a tan, right?

Staff

Hey, you know you can

just borrow one of my suits.

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

I'd love a swim-in.

Guest

That'd be great.

Staff

Yeah?

Staff

Weren't you gonna go up to

Staff

get some sunscreen anyway?

Guest

Oh, yeah.

Staff

You could grab it for him.

Staff

Oh, yeah. I'll come up

Staff

with you actually,

Staff

'cause I gotta change

into it anyway.

Guest

Another round of Spritzes, E?

Staff

Sure, I'm on it!

Staff

Another round?

Staff

Yeah, he likes to order

'em before they're gone.

Yeah.

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Yeah.

What are you...

Staff

What the fuck?

Oh, my God.

Staff

I... I... I must have

been disassociating.

Staff

I was seeing

Staff

all these faces of men

Staff

with these very

effeminate hairstyles.

And then...

Staff

I saw you,

Staff

and your eyes were

Staff

like shark eyes,

like just completely dead.

Just like, dead.

Staff

Well, you really know

how to pump a guy up.

Staff

Must've been the Bonine

that I took before the flight.

I didn't get to finish.

I need to take a breather.

Staff

Yeah?

Staff

You ate all

Staff

the macaroons, didn't you?

Staff

What macaroons?

Staff

How do you expect

Staff

to lose weight if you inhale

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five macaroons

Staff

and not even remember?

There were only three.

There were five.

Staff

Did you drink

Staff

the champagne, too?

I think he put them in here.

Yeah.

Guest

Oh, washing bag?

Staff

Yes.

Staff

I know we don't know

Staff

each other that well,

Staff

but I really appreciate you

being here.

You know, it means a lot.

Staff

Ethan never really

Staff

brought around a lot of girls,

so I'm just so happy that he found someone.

I think it's great.

Well, thanks for inviting us.

Sure.

Guest

It'll be fun.

Staff

It will be.

Guest

I'm gonna get the sunscreen.

Staff

Yeah.

Hey.

Guest

Hey!

Staff

What do you think?

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Little snug, right?

I think they're fine.

Yeah? Hmm.

Can't find the sunscreen.

Staff

You know what? They probably

Staff

have a bunch of that

by the pool.

Guest

I'm gonna keep looking.

Staff

Yeah.

Guest

Hey, I'll see you down there.

Staff

Hmm.

Guest

Hi.

Staff

Hey, um,

Nonno fell by the pool.

Guest

What?

Staff

He's fine. Um,

but I think he hit his head.

He could have a concussion.

Staff

I'm thinking someone

should sleep with him tonight.

Guest

Keep an eye on him.

Staff

Yeah. Good idea.

Um...

Uh, we'll put him in your room.

Staff

I got work stuff. L.A. will

Staff

still be up. I'm gonna be up

and around all night.

So let's just, uh...

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We'll put him

Staff

in your room. Okay?

Okay.

Guest

Anything else?

Staff

No.

Staff

What do you say, dinner at 8:00?

Guest

Yeah. Sure.

Staff

All right.

Hmm.

Niente.

Guest

Hmm?

Staff

Mia.

No.

Good evening, Mr. and Mrs. Hunt.

Guest

Ah, Mikael. This is my wife, Tanya.

Staff

Welcome.

Guest

Nice to meet you, Mrs. Tanya.

Staff

Hi. Hi.

Staff

How are you today?

Guest

I heard a lot about you.

Staff

Oh.

Nice to meet you.

Staff

How was your day today?

Oh, it was a... it was a...

It was a good day.

Guest

One sec.

Staff

Did you watch the football today?

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Int. White Lotus Resort - Day

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No, well, my country has

a whole different kind of football.

I told you to stay in the room.

I had to eat.

Oh, my God.

He's gonna flip the fuck out.

Staff

What are you... Shit!

Here. Hold that.

Anyway. Here she is.

Guest

Sorry.

Staff

Shall we go to the table?

Guest

Yeah, why not? Let's eat.

Staff

Please.

Guest

Okay.

Staff

I'll take you to the table.

Guest

Follow me, please.

Staff

Oh, my God.

Guest

Thanks, I love it.

Staff

I got it, I got it.

Staff

We just flew

all the way in from Los Angeles.

Just to be here in Sicily.

Because we are Sicilian.

Staff

Are you Sicilian?

Guest

Yes, from Catania.

Staff

Ah. Are you married?

Staff

Dad, why don't you let her

Staff

put our order in

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Int. White Lotus Resort - Day

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so I can get a drink?

Staff

My son is a big muckity-muck

Staff

in Hollywood,

Guest

so he's very impatient.

Staff

I'll bring you your drinks.

Guest

Thank you.

Staff

Thanks. Sorry.

Thank you.

Guest

Dad, you gotta knock it off.

Staff

Oh. What's the problem?

Staff

What are you doing?

Staff

I mean, what's... the point?

Staff

Flirting is one

of the pleasures of life.

Staff

Do you actually think

Staff

you have a chance

Staff

with any of these women?

Oh, don't be rude.

Staff

I'm just saying,

you're 80 years old.

Well, I'm still a man.

Staff

And I get older and older,

Staff

but the women I desire

remain young.

Staff

Natural, right?

You can relate to that.

Can you still get...

Guest

Or... Do you still get...

Scene 38

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Staff

What? Hard?

Staff

Erections?

Sure. Like that.

Guest

Really?

Staff

Albie.

Staff

Do you still, like, jerk off?

Staff

Doctors say you need

to release once a day...

Guest

otherwise you get backed up.

Staff

Wait a second.

Staff

Doctors say you need

Staff

to jerk off once a day?

Guest

That's right. That's right.

Staff

Which doctors say that?

You need to drain the sack.

Guest

They say that?

Staff

Mm-hmm.

Common knowledge.

Staff

God. It just seems like the body

Staff

would naturally stop

Staff

getting horny

Staff

once you're past the age

Staff

of procreation, you know?

Like at 50, you would just stop.

Fifty? Fifty's not that old.

Guest

It just seems undignified.

Staff

I'm still virile, by the way.

Staff

I could still impregnate

Scene 39

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a woman.

Guest

Oh.

Staff

No girl

Staff

should have to be exposed

to an old guy's junk.

Staff

It's not like it was ever

so beautiful to look at anyway.

I mean, it's a penis.

It's not a sunset.

Hookers.

Staff

Really?

Oh, yeah.

Looks like a couple of locals.

Buona sera.

Come on, man.

Staff

You don't recognize a hooker?

So innocent, man.

Just like in college.

Ethan was the original incel.

Staff

What are you talking about?

No, I wasn't.

Yeah, you were.

Come on, man.

No, I'm... I'm kidding.

I'm kidding, man.

Staff

I'm joking, all right? Look,

you could have gotten laid.

Guest

He's a handsome guy, right?

Scene 40

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Staff

Yeah.

Jesus Christ, look at you.

You're a handsome guy.

I'd do ya.

Staff

You're just such

a workhorse, man.

You never came out of your room.

Well, he's still like that.

Staff

Okay, I think we should

Staff

split the arugula salad

Staff

and the beet salad,

Staff

and then maybe get

the raviolo and the vitello.

Staff

I kinda wanted

to try the fish, but...

Guest

The whitefish?

Staff

Yeah.

Hmm.

No, I feel it'll be too fishy.

Okay.

Staff

I mean, it's whitefish,

it's pretty light.

It's not a very fishy fish.

Well, you can get it tomorrow.

We're gonna be here all week.

Okay. All right. Yeah.

Or we can have the whitefish.

Let's do it.

Scene 41

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I just don't like it

when it's too fishy.

Guest

Mm-hmm. Yeah, me too.

Staff

Yeah, sure.

Guest

Great.

Staff

Great. It sounds good.

Let's do it.

Guest

Neat.

Staff

Wine, people?

Yes.

Guest

What do we want?

Staff

I like white.

Me too. I prefer white.

Staff

I don't know

what they're clapping for.

This singer's abominable.

Sounded okay to me.

Go to your room.

Go. Your room.

Your room.

Staff

You're not feeling sluggish

Staff

or not concentrating?

Head is fine.

And it's not gonna happen again.

It was a little fall, nothing.

Staff

You should sleep

with Albie anyway.

All right.

Scene 42

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Hmm.

Staff

I was told that the cheese here

Staff

was made by a blind nun

in a basement.

Staff

Hey!

Staff

You know,

I... I think you're fine.

Staff

You... you didn't hit your head

Staff

that hard or... you know,

so, I should...

I'm just gonna go.

So, I'll see you in the morning.

Guest

Good night.

Staff

Good night, Nonno. Sleep well.

Buona sera.

Grazie.

Oh, grazie.

Hmm.

Staff

Hmm?

No. No, no, no, no.

Mm-hmm.

Staff

Hmm?

Staff

She was

definitely more talkative by the pool.

Staff

And at dinner,

she was actually kinda nice.

Well...

Staff

now that he's loaded,

Scene 43

Int. White Lotus Resort - Day

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do you think

Staff

he regrets marrying such a dud?

Staff

Cam, I wanna Face Time

them again.

Guest

What?

Staff

Please?

Honey, come on.

We just hung up.

I know, but I miss Emma so much.

I know.

Of course you do.

Staff

But that's not the point,

Staff

all right?

The point is...

Staff

we're in Italy, honey. Okay?

Guest

Mm-Hmm.

Staff

We're on vacation.

Guest

Just you and me.

Staff

Yeah.

Guest

We need to enjoy it.

Staff

Okay.

Guest

Just me and my baby.

Staff

Ooh.

Guest

And you know what that means.

Staff

What?

Guest

You need something.

Staff

Mm-hmm.

You need...

Scene 44

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Guest

A tickle attack.

Staff

No!

Staff

No!

Guest

Please! Stop!

Staff

Tickle, tickle, tickle. I got you!

Staff

No, stop it!

Staff

Hey, hey!

Staff

Is he hurting her?

Guest

No! No...

Staff

Hey! Tickle attack!

Staff

Monkey man, monkey man!

No.

Staff

Thanks for making more

of an effort.

Staff

I mean, yeah, they kind

of live in a bubble, but...

Staff

they're fun, right?

They don't vote, Ethan.

Staff

I know. What the fuck?

They don't read the news.

They don't read.

Staff

It's like,

Staff

what do they even talk about?

Staff

Is that what happens

Staff

when you're rich for too long,

Staff

your brain just atrophies?

I mean, they seem happy.

No way. It's a front.

Scene 45

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It's good to have, you know,

diverse friends, I guess.

Staff

Yeah, I think

we're their diverse friends.

Staff

Their

White-passing diverse friends.

Yeah, you're right.

Staff

When we came up here

Staff

to get the suit,

Staff

he just took all

Staff

of his clothes off

in the middle of the room.

Like, naked.

And then you...

Staff

Like, where were you?

In the bathroom.

Doesn't seem that weird.

Just getting changed.

Staff

Baby, come here!

Baby, come on.

Staff

No!

Wow.

All right, look.

Staff

Look. Listen,

Staff

I don't wanna fucking talk

Staff

about this right now, okay?

Yes, I'm going to. Yeah.

This is not the time.

Scene 46

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Yes.

Fuck.

Guest

Hi.

Staff

Hey.

Staff

Who are you talking to?

It's work. It's Bob.

Staff

Oh, Bob. Well,

Staff

why were you whispering?

Staff

I... I thought you were trying

to get ready for bed.

Staff

Oh, well. Guess what?

Guest

Huh?

Staff

Look what I found.

Guest

Oh, okay.

Staff

Two macaroons!

Guest

Yeah, great.

Staff

Yeah.

I really did only eat three.

Oh. Well, great.

Staff

You had a whole

panna cotta at dinner.

Staff

Well, eat them,

'cause you wanted 'em.

I don't want them now.

Staff

Why? Yeah, take them,

they're good.

Tanya, I just brushed my teeth.

I'm on the phone.

Scene 47

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Uh, Bob, I gotta go...

Guest

Here you go.

Staff

Thank you.

Guest

Cheers.

Staff

Cheers.

Staff

I went down to the dock

when your boat arrived.

Staff

I wanted to see

what you looked like.

Staff

What'd you think?

Very handsome.

Thank you.

And you're from Los Angeles.

Staff

It's amazing. I always dreamt

of going to Los Angeles.

It is my dream.

Uh, I mean...

You should go.

I don't have the money.

Staff

You seem like

a very nice person. Um...

Staff

I'm just going through a lot

right now in my life.

So, it's... it's, um...

Staff

hard for me

to make conversation right now.

Staff

But you are very,

uh, beautiful.

Scene 48

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I'm glad you're here.

All or a...